Author Topic: Junk Mail Novel  (Read 18167 times)

rayner23

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Junk Mail Novel
« on: June 10, 2010, 09:57:48 PM »
Spam mail provides some really interesting writing and I would like to compile some of it so I could use it in writing somehow in the future (I'm not sure how, but it never hurts to place things in the tool box). I know everyone has seen this stuff and I think it's cool all the weird shit that comes in. Add your stuff here.


Subject: Hardcore lingerie siren watch

Alleged street race leads to hit and run charge

VCenter upgrade all done. I babysat her on my birthday.

Search engine market share at eww lecuturing is beginning

Mattklewis Do we know if she is or is not a lesbian today 1 8 of Between A Clutch and A Hard Place avail.
I'm from Alaska. About Fifty miles south of Ankorage there's a little fishing town, maybe you've heard of it, it's called fuck your momma.

Setherick

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Re: Junk Mail Novel
« Reply #1 on: June 10, 2010, 11:51:32 PM »
Here's one I got recently that you should enjoy:

Quote
Dear Allah elected one.
I am glad to know you, but Allah knows you better and he knows why he has directed me to you at this point in time so do not be afraid. I saw your e-mail contact at tunishian ministries of commerce and foreign trade departments .  I am writing this mail to you with heavy sorrow in my heart, My Name is mrs.Zaafira Aijaz.
 
I want to tell you this because I don’t have any other option than to tell you as I was touched to open up to you, I am married to Alhj.Usman Aijaz who worked with Tunisia embassy in Burkina Faso for nine years before he died in the year 2005.We were married for eleven years without a child. He died after a brief illness that lasted for only five days.
 
Since his death I decided not to remarry, When my late husband was alive he deposited the sum of US$ 8.2m(Eight million two hundred thousand dollars)in a bank in Ouagadougou the capital city of Burkina Faso in west Africa Presently this money is still in bank. He made this money available for exportation of Gold from Burkina Faso mining. Recently, My Doctor told me that I would not last for the period of seven months due to cancer problem. Whoever that wants to serve Allah must serve him in spirit and Truth because Allah is the Most High, Please always be prayerful all through your life.
 
The one that disturbs me most is my cancer sickness. Having known my condition I decided to hand you over this money to take care of the less-privileged people, you will utilize this money the way I am going to instruct herein. I want you to take 30 Percent of the total money for your personal use While 70% of the money will go to charity" people in the street and helping the orphanage.
 
I don't have any child that will inherit this money and my husband relatives are not good not even good at all because they are the one that responsible for the death of my late husband in other to have all my late husband properties and I don't want my husband's efforts to be used by those that conspired for his death. I grew up as an Orphan and I don't have anybody as my family member, just to endeavour that the name of Allah is maintained... Am doing this so that Allah will forgive my sins and accept my soul because this sickness has suffered me so much.
 
As soon as I receive your reply I shall give you the contact of the bank in Burkina Faso and I will send authority letter that will prove you the present beneficiary of the money in the bank that is if you assure me that you will act accordingly as I Stated herein. Hopiing to receive your reply.

Also, does anyone know if someone has come up with a mythos email spam generator idea for COC/DG? Because, if not, I'm going to write it up.
« Last Edit: June 10, 2010, 11:57:24 PM by Setherick »
"Something smart so that I can impress people I don't know." - Some Author I've Not Read

rayner23

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Re: Junk Mail Novel
« Reply #2 on: June 13, 2010, 09:15:31 PM »
jayisedge pretty sure it was Pat Flynn's favorite book js smoking non smoking Harvard prof invents Le Whif breathable food. think I'll stick to mainlining
I'm from Alaska. About Fifty miles south of Ankorage there's a little fishing town, maybe you've heard of it, it's called fuck your momma.

Setherick

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Re: Junk Mail Novel
« Reply #3 on: November 21, 2010, 08:15:49 AM »
I'm resing this thread simply so I can post the latest piece of spam that got past my spam filters. It's a good one.

Quote
Hello My Dear,

I am writing this mail to you with tears and sorrow from my heart.With due respect, trust and humanity, i appeal to you to exercise a little patience and read through my letter I feel quite safe dealing with you in this important and serious issue having gone through your remarkable profile, honestly I am writing this email to you with pains, tears and sorrow from my heart, I will really like to have a good relationship with you and I have a special reason why I decided to contact you, I decided to contact you due to the urgency of my situation.
My name is Miss Clementina Adisa, 23yrs old female and I currently resident here in Senegal West Africa as a refugee and I am for a reliable person that will help and direct me with my inheritance.

Please my dear respond to my message as soon as you receive it so I will give you more about me and the main reason of my mail.

Hoping to hear from you soon.

Thanks and God bless you.

Miss Clementina Adisa
"Something smart so that I can impress people I don't know." - Some Author I've Not Read

rayner23

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Re: Junk Mail Novel
« Reply #4 on: November 21, 2010, 11:44:33 AM »
That was amazing! Check out some stuff from Popgun Chaos's spam filter.

- (from the Tom Jane interview) good molly Popgun Chao$! , i review your blog , this a nice blog and greatly. Good for everyone. best review for Popgun Chaos Comics! and content. i will visit to read and review your site.

- (from the War of the Juggalos) Lovely sharp post. Never thought that it was this easy. Extolment to you!

- (from Samantha's novel) My partner and I really enjoyed reading this blog post, I was just itching to know do you trade featured posts? I am always trying to find someone to make trades with and merely thought I would ask.

- (from my China Mieville interview) Simply, one of the best article l have come across on this precious subject. I quite agree with your suppositions and will eagerly look forward to your forthcoming updates.

- (from my Mark Waid interview) I have a problem with the overall premise of your article but I still think its really informative. I really like your other posts. Keep up the great work. If you can add more video and pictures can be much better. Because they help much clear understanding.  thanks Michaelhicks.

- (from the Zardoz review) Hey i am suuper boy
I'm from Alaska. About Fifty miles south of Ankorage there's a little fishing town, maybe you've heard of it, it's called fuck your momma.

Maze

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Re: Junk Mail Novel
« Reply #5 on: November 21, 2010, 01:07:13 PM »
What the fuck? Do their username link to a website or something when they post comments?

rayner23

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Re: Junk Mail Novel
« Reply #6 on: November 25, 2010, 09:42:13 PM »
Greetings, this is a truly absorbing Internet weblog and I have cherished studying several with the content and posts contained on the internet site, maintain up the excellent do the job and wish to go through a great deal more stimulating articles in the long term.
I'm from Alaska. About Fifty miles south of Ankorage there's a little fishing town, maybe you've heard of it, it's called fuck your momma.

clockworkjoe

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Re: Junk Mail Novel
« Reply #7 on: November 25, 2010, 09:48:24 PM »
SPAM POST ONE
о банковских операций. на соответствии с федеральным законом “О банках и банковской деятельности”, Банк России в сложившихся условиях /неисполнение банком обязательств свыше 14 дней/ исполнил обязанность до отзыву лицензии в устройство банковских операций. МАКБ “Премьер” является участником системы страхования банковских вкладов. Отзыв лицензии в устройство банковских операций является страховым случаем, предусмотренным федеральным законом N177-ФЗ “О страховании вкладов физических лиц в банках Российской Федерации”.на Ингушетии введен порядок контртеррористической операции МОСКВА, 28 авг – РИА Новости. в течение Ингушетии в населенном пункте Сурхахи Назрановского района введен строй контртеррористической операции, сообщили в день РИА Новости в Оперативном штабе республики. “Обстановка в Ингушетия продолжает оставаться сложной. Правоохранительные органы располагают информацией о том, который вооруженные члены бандгруппы, причастные для совершению отдельно тяжких преступлений в территории Ингуше

SPAM POST TWO
Mighty post! this will mean aid me.

SPAM POST THREE
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SPAM POST FOUR
?????????? ????? ??????????
?? ??????? ??????????
?????????? ??? ?????????????? ?????
???? ?????????? ?? ???????

emmanuelrichardson
??????? ??????.??? ???? ???????? ?????????? ??????????? ?????? ??????????? ????? — ???????? ??? ?????? ? ????????? ?????? ?????? ????? ??????????????? ?????????? ??????????????? ?????? ?????, ??????? ????????? contempoay jazz, ? ????? ? ???????? ?????? ????????????, ?? ?????? ?????? ??????????????? ????????. ?????????????? ??????? ?, ???????? ?????????? ???????, ?????? ?????? ????????, ?? ?????? ? ??????, ??? ???????? ????????, ????????????, ??????? ???????????, ??????? ??????????? ? ????????????. ?????? ??? ????????? ???????????????? ????????? As Nova, ? ??????? ??????????? ???????? ????????????? ??????? ? ??????? ???????? ? ? ????????? ??????? ???????? ??????????? ???.????????????? ?????? ???????? ???????? ????????? ?????????????????? ? ?????????? ??? ? ????????????? ??????? ???? ???-??????? ??? ????????? ? ???????? ?????????? ?????? ??????????? ???? ?’?????.? ???? ???????????? ? ????? ????????? ? ?????? Heaven and Hell, Motohead ? ?? ?? ???? ????, ???? ? “????????????” ? ????? ????? ???

??? ?????????? ? ????????
?????????? ? ? ??????????
?????????? ? ?????? ??? ?

???????? ??????????? ????????????-????????????? ????????? ??? ??????? ??????? ??????????? ?????????????. ? ???? ????? ??? ?????? ???????, ??? ????? ??????????. ??????, ????? ? ??????? ????? “?????? ??????” ???????? ??????????????? ??????????? ? ???????, ??, “?????” ????????????? ????? ??????? ????????, ?????? ??????? ??? ??????? ??????. ?????? ??, ????????????? ????? ?????, ????? “???????????” ???????? ??? ??????????? ? ?????? ?????????. ?????????? ?????? ???????????? ????????? ? ?????? ?????????????? ???????. ????????? ????? ????? ? ????? “??????????”. ?????? ????????? ? ??????????????? ???????, ????????? ? “?????? ??????” ???? ????? ???????? ??? ??????, ?????, ???????, ????? ?????? ???????????? ??????? ??? “???????????” ???????, ??????? ??? “??????? ??????” ??????? ????? ??????. ?????? ????? ??? ???? ???? ????????? ?? ?????? ??????????, ??? ??????? ???????? ????? ??????????? ??? ????? ?????????. ????? ??????, ? ???? ????? ???? ?????? ???????????, ?????? ? ??????? ? ??????????? ????

Joven

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Re: Junk Mail Novel
« Reply #8 on: November 25, 2010, 10:29:08 PM »
Spam post by mentally ill cuckoo banaynayse guy: (despite the lines and breaks, thats only 1 post)

Quote
you are ENEMIES OF GOD AND ARE GOING TO BE ANNIHILATED...

Repent and turn to God or be destroyed...

YOU HAVE NO CHOICE...

my interpretation of the STATUE FIRE... it symbolizes the SPIRITUAL
DEATH of atheism...



http://www.latimes.com/news/custom/topofthetimes/national/la-naw-0616-jesus-statue-lightning-20100616,0,4295974.story


http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2010/6/16/1276680110544/The-King-of-Kings-statue--005.jpg



http://www.latimes.com/media/photo/2010-06/54332292.jpg


http://friendlyatheist.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/butterjesus-1.jpg



PRINCESS DI IS WEARING A NEW DRESS!


http://www.princeofwales.gov.uk/speechesandarticles/a_speech_by_hrh_the_prince_of_wales_titled_islam_and_the_env_252516346.html

______________________________

http://skepticblog.org/2010/04/06/wo...for-a-miracle/

Shermer, I WANT TO SEE YOU BEG FOR A MIRACLE...
___________________


we do like your music Lady Gaga, but...


The B**BQUAKE - 911


Let me show you the FATE OF TRAITORS...


http://www.loiterink.com/photos/products/182_3424_500x500.jpg

they are incapable of telling the difference between SCIENTIFIC *FACT*
AND RELIGIOUS AND PHILOSOPHICAL *TRUTH*... FATAL ERROR!

they also preach a *VALUE FREE SCIENCE* called *POSITIVISM* that
ignores the inequalities of wealth and power in capitalist
civilization...



for a sample taste of PZ Myers' GARBAGE...

http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/2010/06/sunday_sacrilege_imagine_no_he.php


HIJACKING IN PROGRESS!!!

http://hawaiiwebgroup.com/maui-design/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/website-hijacking.jpg


HIJACKING IN PROGRESS!!!

how can these HEADLESS IDIOTS BET AGAINST GOD!!!
________________________________________


what happens when you LOSE Pascal's Wager...


http://www.peterkreeft.com/topics/pascals-wager.htm

_____________


you FIGHT PAPER MONSTERS...

the blood and bodies of the atheist movement...


you mofos killed MICKEY MOUSE!!!!


this has more TRUTH then what Dawkins, Randi, Harris, Myers, and
Shermer
combined have said in their entire lives...


http://www.youtube.com/watch#!v=5R2wE8Sduhs&playnext_from=TL&videos=hht1U_19anc&feature=rec-LGOUT-exp_fresh%2Bdiv-1r-3-HM



they tried to BULLDOZE the entire METAPHYSICAL DIMENSION...

they LOST THE WAR......

you have FORFEIT YOUR SOUL, shermer... you have become an object in
the
material world, as you WISHED...

<a href="" target="_blank" class="aeva_link bbc_link new_win"></a>


http://farm1.static.flickr.com/7/11792994_ffaaee87fa.jpg

we're gonna smash that TV...

They had become ENEMIES OF THE PEOPLE AND OF GOD...
you pushed too much and *CROSSED THE LINE*

degenerates (PZ) or children (HEMANT) - ATHEISTS!

<a href="" target="_blank" class="aeva_link bbc_link new_win"></a>


do you have anything to say, you STUPID LITTLE F*CKER?

how about I tell you, Mr. Shermer, EVERYTHING YOU THINK ABOUT THE
WORLD is

*WRONG*

THE BOOBQUAKE - 911!

http://dissidentphilosophy.lifediscussion.net/philosophy-f1/the-boobquake-911-t1310.htm

<a href="" target="_blank" class="aeva_link bbc_link new_win"></a>


RUN, ATHEISTS, RUN!!!

-------------------

http://www.4degreez.com/misc/dante-inferno-information.html

the 9th and FINAL RING of Dante's Inferno is designed for little
blaspheming traitors like you...

"This is the deepest level of hell, where the fallen angel Satan
himself resides. His wings flap eternally, producing chilling cold
winds that freeze the thick ice found in Cocytus..."


but at least FREE AIR CONDITIONING is included!
« Last Edit: November 25, 2010, 11:03:26 PM by Joven »

rayner23

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Re: Junk Mail Novel
« Reply #9 on: November 26, 2010, 08:02:52 AM »
"they tried to BULLDOZE the entire METAPHYSICAL DIMENSION..."

I think is the best line ever. I plan on using this in a story at some point.
I'm from Alaska. About Fifty miles south of Ankorage there's a little fishing town, maybe you've heard of it, it's called fuck your momma.

Maze

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Re: Junk Mail Novel
« Reply #10 on: November 26, 2010, 01:09:03 PM »
SPAM POST ONE
о банковских операций. на соответствии с федеральным законом “О банках и банковской деятельности”, Банк России в сложившихся условиях /неисполнение банком обязательств свыше 14 дней/ исполнил обязанность до отзыву лицензии в устройство банковских операций. МАКБ “Премьер” является участником системы страхования банковских вкладов. Отзыв лицензии в устройство банковских операций является страховым случаем, предусмотренным федеральным законом N177-ФЗ “О страховании вкладов физических лиц в банках Российской Федерации”.на Ингушетии введен порядок контртеррористической операции МОСКВА, 28 авг – РИА Новости. в течение Ингушетии в населенном пункте Сурхахи Назрановского района введен строй контртеррористической операции, сообщили в день РИА Новости в Оперативном штабе республики. “Обстановка в Ингушетия продолжает оставаться сложной. Правоохранительные органы располагают информацией о том, который вооруженные члены бандгруппы, причастные для совершению отдельно тяжких преступлений в территории Ингуше

GOOGLE: TRANSLATE!

of banking operations. in accordance with federal law "On Banks and Banking, Bank of Russia, under the circumstances / failure to bank liabilities exceeding 14 days to fulfill the obligation to recall the license of banking operations. McBee "Premier" is a member of the bank deposit insurance. Revocation of a license in the unit banking is an insurance case, the federal law N177-FZ "On Insurance of Household Deposits in Banks of the Russian Federation." Ingushetia to put the order of the counterterrorist operation MOSCOW, August 28 - RIA Novosti. for a village in Ingushetia, Nazran District Surkhakhi entered operational counter-terrorism operations, told RIA Novosti news agency a day in the Operational Headquarters of the Republic. "The situation in Ingushetia continues to be difficult. Law enforcement agencies have information that armed members of the gang involved in the commission separately for violent crimes in the territory of Ingushetia

Boyos

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Re: Junk Mail Novel
« Reply #11 on: November 26, 2010, 01:45:05 PM »
Told you not to order that russian bride!

rayner23

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Re: Junk Mail Novel
« Reply #12 on: November 26, 2010, 03:37:06 PM »
They are just fucking toying with me now:

http://hubpages.com/hub/Robonica-Roboni-i-Programmable-Gaming-Robots
I love your site, numerous times I visit sites and they’re simply rife with spam. But, this is real quality
I'm from Alaska. About Fifty miles south of Ankorage there's a little fishing town, maybe you've heard of it, it's called fuck your momma.

rayner23

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Re: Junk Mail Novel
« Reply #13 on: November 30, 2010, 10:10:38 PM »
Barbie Princess v informed me that in regards to my Final Fantasy Tactics article "I was glad to see this news."

I'm glad that she is glad.
I'm from Alaska. About Fifty miles south of Ankorage there's a little fishing town, maybe you've heard of it, it's called fuck your momma.

clockworkjoe

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Re: Junk Mail Novel
« Reply #14 on: December 01, 2010, 04:30:58 PM »
Encrypt messages with spam

http://www.spammimic.com/explain.shtml