The Role Playing Public Radio Forums
General Category => General Chaos => : dragonshaos April 18, 2009, 03:48:01 AM
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Found this by just clicking around:
http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0046/0046_01.asp
It's a comic strip from the 70/80's about how D&D is for cults and jesus is awesome.
I found it to be hilarious however.
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Jack Chick tracts are part of gamer mythos down here. Whenever you'd get an RP book from B. Dalton's or Books-A-Million, it was tradition to turn it with pages facing down toward the floor and give it three or four shakes. If a Jack Chick tract fell out, then you knew it was a good book, two or even three fell out, then you knew what you had in your hands was pure RPing gold. It was like instead of dissuading us from playing with these tools of Satan, they became just another facet of gamer oneupsmanship. It was not uncommon to open the back of someone's book to find the Jack Chick tract that had been in it taped to the back, it was a badge of honor.
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I never knew of any of that shit, it's cool i want a jack chick badge of honor
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your not ready kid. your power level is only 8,999, soon though.
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obligatory link to dead alewives sketch http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hsb4IcKwgEs
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The artwork looks like Phil Jimenez's work which gives the strips an odd appeal to me. I love me some Jimenez (except when he betrayed me to go to Marvel the bastard . . . who am I kidding, I bought Spider-man just because he did the art).
Also, how would this deter people from playing D&D? I can be a part of a witch's coven? Hells yes! You know what they do in witch's covens? They have ritualistic, tantric sex! I'm all about that shit! ;D ;D
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"Your spiritual growth through the game is more important than some lousy loser's life!"
My response, "Yeah. I guess you're right. I am no longer upset."
I know this is so supposed to be anti-D&D, but it reads more like a study in player logic.
Also, I love the "WARNING: see Acts 19:13-17" they put where the preacher is blessing the girl.
In conclusion, I sent this e-mail to the company. Granted, no one will probably read it, but I sent it anyway.
To whom it may concern:
A few years ago, I was in a really bad spot. I had joined up with some "Dungeons and Dragons" players and things got pretty bad. After my cleric (a character class I assumed was holy) achieved level 9, I was introduced to a Witch's coven so I could achieve real power in life. I was masturbating in order to cast magick every single day. I could see the world change around me. I called it the old "wank and wish."
Anyway, I sort of thought that things were going too far when a friend of mine committed suicide because she felt unworthy to play with us (she sorta deserved it because she was a real D-bag, lol!). What really hit home though, was when my best friend committed suicide because his paladin died. I mean, I realized then that this game was taking things too far. Like a drug though, I couldn't escape because of all the masturbation magick I was doing. I'd wank and wish for a sandwich and sure enough, one would be in my sticky hand by the end of the day. Though I was pleasuring myself nearly every hour at this point, I knew I had to change. I couldn't say why I had to change because life was perfect other than the suicides, but I knew I had to.
That's when I came across your site and your educational cartoons over Dungeons and Dragons. I saw a little piece of myself in those cartoons and I realized that I had to change my way of life. I decided to let a new Dungeon Master in my heart. The ultimate Dungeon Master. Jesus Christ.
Through Jesus's teachings, I learned that I didn't have to roll a 20-sided die to see the world around me. I could just look around. I learned that sacrificing orphans in house fires just because they saw me commit a murder so my friend could be let out of jail is most definitely wrong. Most of all, I learned that my real enemy wasn't a bunch of creatures in a Monster Manual, but sin and since everyone sins in the world, then I have an unlimited supply of enemies I can face.
Anyway, thank you so much for showing me the way, the truth and the light. My newfound faith in Christianity has stopped my masturbatory habits and I have come closer to God. Really close. Scary close. Sometimes, when I murder people, I feel like I'm doing his work for him. He's the creator of everything and I am the destroyer. Thank you.
-Lightbringer Leo
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Also, I love the "WARNING: see Acts 19:13-17" they put where the preacher is blessing the girl.
I love it when people pick Bible verses at random and then have to struggle to make it mean something in the context. For instance, someone explain to me how Act 19:13-17 has to do with role playing?
13Then certain of the vagabond Jews, exorcists, took upon them to call over them which had evil spirits the name of the LORD Jesus, saying, We adjure you by Jesus whom Paul preacheth.
14And there were seven sons of one Sceva, a Jew, and chief of the priests, which did so.
15And the evil spirit answered and said, Jesus I know, and Paul I know; but who are ye?
16And the man in whom the evil spirit was leaped on them, and overcame them, and prevailed against them, so that they fled out of that house naked and wounded.
17And this was known to all the Jews and Greeks also dwelling at Ephesus; and fear fell on them all, and the name of the Lord Jesus was magnified.
Also, Lucifer is the Lightbringer, not Leo. ;)
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I love christians. when my Branden started playing D&D with us his mom got all freaked out and wanted to see the books and make sure they weren't evil. I sat her down and explained what the game was and so on and so forth. eventually she gave up and let him play.
as of late I have thrown him into the world of "call of cthulhu". if his mom wasn't pissed before she will be now. soon he will be ready to join the cult of the cathartic lobster.
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All hail the cathartic lobster!
I went through a fake e-mail where my fake name is Leo. I put the Lightbringer part there so they would make the connection to Lucifer (hopefully). I didn't want to be too overt with the whole "Lucifer" thing. Also, for those of you who are Thunderbolts fans, I clearly paraphrased Bullseye with the whole "God's the creator and I am the destroyer" thing. Man, I used to love Warren Ellis so much.
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13Then certain of the vagabond Jews, exorcists, took upon them to call over them which had evil spirits the name of the LORD Jesus, saying, We adjure you by Jesus whom Paul preacheth.
14And there were seven sons of one Sceva, a Jew, and chief of the priests, which did so.
15And the evil spirit answered and said, Jesus I know, and Paul I know; but who are ye?
16And the man in whom the evil spirit was leaped on them, and overcame them, and prevailed against them, so that they fled out of that house naked and wounded.
17And this was known to all the Jews and Greeks also dwelling at Ephesus; and fear fell on them all, and the name of the Lord Jesus was magnified.
Wow, this sounds more like the story of ghost Jesus raping little boys than anything else. What on earth?
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Wow, this sounds more like the story of ghost Jesus raping little boys than anything else. What on earth?
To quote the Bible by way of George Carlin, "Suffer the little children, come unto me."
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All hail the cathartic lobster! ;D
I hpoe you get a reply to that email you proly won't but it would be great.
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All hail the cathartic lobster! ;D
I hpoe you get a reply to that email you proly won't but it would be great.
That's more like it!
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All hail the cathartic lobster!
I went through a fake e-mail where my fake name is Leo. I put the Lightbringer part there so they would make the connection to Lucifer (hopefully). I didn't want to be too overt with the whole "Lucifer" thing. Also, for those of you who are Thunderbolts fans, I clearly paraphrased Bullseye with the whole "God's the creator and I am the destroyer" thing. Man, I used to love Warren Ellis so much.
have you read "Transmetropolitan". I just got turned onto it by some newly acquired* friends. it is fucking awesome. Ive fallen in love with Spider Jerusalem.
*inanimate objects in my room dresses up to be people.
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That's the next big series I have to buy all the trades to.
Currently I am collecting Daredevil trades of the Bendis variety.
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Bendis Kicks ass. I met him at a wizards convention a few years back, and by "met" I mean waved at him from across the convention hall. I really enjoyed his work on "House of M" and "Secret Invasion".
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Not a fan of his big event stuff. House of M had a good philosophical argument to it, but it was debated on one page and Wolverine squashed it.
Spider-woman: we all have what we want. Shouldn't we just accept this new reality?
Wolverine: No.
Spider-woman: I mean, shouldn't we at least talk about -
Wolverine: No.
(uncomfortable silence)
Wolverine: Bub.
I'm not a fan of Secret Invasion either. It was a transition crossover to a new crossover.
When Bendis does street-level stuff, I love him. I don't think he can plot very well mostly because he has openly admitted that he writes himself into a corner and then writes himself out of it and that is no way to write a story. Therefore, you can read a Bendis story and it all looks bad until the deus ex machina appears and fixes everything.
Where he shines though is his dialogue. He writes dialogue better than any other comic writer. Hands down, there is no one better.
I mean, look at Powers. Perfect dialogue that is fun, witty and real. His plots (other than "Who Killed Retro Girl") all have weak endings.
Anyway, I know I seem really negative on a writer that I initiated the conversation on, so I will step back a moment and say that his Daredevil run is amazing.
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I love it, you praise Bendis out one side your mouth then trash him with the other. have you read "Secret Invasion"....rhetorical question I know you probably have. the arc on that was amazing. at first I didn't pick up the issues when they were on sale, for reasons I cant remember. the only reason I bought the trade was because I'm preparing for comic con. now I sorely regret not following the story all along. its like invasion of the body snatchers...WITH SUPERHEORS. how do you fight an enemy that you cant see and has all the powers you do? but if your looking to "superhero" comics for great philosophical insight you may be looking in the wrong place. that's not to say a pearl of wisdom may not drop out once in awhile but that's not why most people read them.
either way I digress we should probably move this to its own forum if were gonna continue this discussion.