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General Category => Role Playing Public Radio Podcast => : rayner23 February 24, 2010, 08:31:05 PM

: Chatting with whores
: rayner23 February 24, 2010, 08:31:05 PM
As loyal listeners of RPPR's New World Campaign know, I really want to play a game of D&D with a hooker. Okay, so I don't really, but I think it would be funny to see if I can get a hooker to agree to game with us.

So, guess what I've been doing . . .

I went to Craigslist to see if I could find some whores who would even be willing to discuss the matter. So far, I've sent out numerous e-mails with no response, but I have chatted with a whore named Tina Summers on this matter. Here is our chat log:

me: quick question and this may sound a little weird, but bare with me

me: k?

tina summers: 1 question

me: my friends and I are playing Dungeons and Dragons and I was wondering if you would play with us if we paid you. No sex at all!! Just playing D&D. That's it. Would you do that?

tina summers: no

me: may I ask why not or is that my only question?

tina summers: i dont play and i dont wanna

me: we could teach you on the first and that's totally cool, I respect you as a person as a woman to the second

me: btw, you are totally hawt


Give it a shot and see if you can do any better.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: mrlr February 24, 2010, 09:12:49 PM
I think Cody is just justifying his desire to talk with whores.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: rayner23 February 24, 2010, 09:26:24 PM
Two birds? Meet my one stone.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Kroack February 24, 2010, 11:26:44 PM
me: we could teach you on the first and that's totally cool, I respect you as a person as a woman to the second

Lying is the only way to get what you want. Everyone knows women aren't actually people.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Order66 February 24, 2010, 11:52:16 PM
lol it like i wana play D&D so bad but i have no one to play with (light bulb over head)prostitute
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Maze February 25, 2010, 12:14:57 AM
You forgot to casually mention the after-game cocaine.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Setherick February 25, 2010, 12:23:23 AM
lol it like i wana play D&D so bad but i have no one to play with (light bulb over head)prostitute

See, this would be a really good rip if you had only take the time to type it out using punctuation.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: robotkarateman February 25, 2010, 02:03:58 AM
if you had only take the time to type it out using punctuation.

I dunno, I kinda like the idea of a light-bulb-overhead-prostitute. Sounds like something from Futurama.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: beowuuf February 25, 2010, 02:48:28 AM

I wonder how much power the self-loathing and daddy issues could generate in kW/hrs
: Re: Chatting with whores
: ristarr February 25, 2010, 08:54:20 AM
I think you ought to cut the woman a break.  Playing DnD could offend her religious sensibilities. 
: Re: Chatting with whores
: JonHook February 25, 2010, 09:14:41 AM
I'm totally perplexed on why a super-sexy line like, "You wanna play D&D with me?" didn't work.    ???
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Tadanori Oyama February 25, 2010, 12:02:27 PM
Two birds? Meet my one stone.

Said the testicular torsion survive to the Japanese twins.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: rayner23 February 25, 2010, 06:57:10 PM
I'm totally perplexed on why a super-sexy line like, "You wanna play D&D with me?" didn't work.    ???

She's a whore. I don't need to be sexy as long as I have the dolla dolla bills and what the fuck do you think my portion of the ransom is going to?
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Boyos February 25, 2010, 10:34:38 PM
I'm totally perplexed on why a super-sexy line like, "You wanna play D&D with me?" didn't work.    ???

She's a whore. I don't need to be sexy as long as I have the dolla dolla bills and what the fuck do you think my portion of the ransom is going to?

Thank god for you master!
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Wooberman February 26, 2010, 02:52:52 AM
I'm totally perplexed on why a super-sexy line like, "You wanna play D&D with me?" didn't work.    ???

She's a whore. I don't need to be sexy as long as I have the dolla dolla bills and what the fuck do you think my portion of the ransom is going to?

Thank god for you master!

Bless yourself Master, Bless yourself
: Re: Chatting with whores
: IDaMan008 February 26, 2010, 07:04:19 AM
...

I can't wait for that Actual Play.

"Hi, this is Ross Peyton with Roleplaying Public Radio. Joining me today are Cody, Dan, Bill, Tom, and Cyndi the Prostitute!"
: Re: Chatting with whores
: JonHook February 26, 2010, 08:33:21 AM
...

I can't wait for that Actual Play.

"Hi, this is Ross Peyton with Roleplaying Public Radio. Joining me today are Cody, Dan, Bill, Tom, and Cyndi the Prostitute!"

LOL! I just read that with Ross' announcer voice in my head!
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Charlie72 February 26, 2010, 02:48:30 PM
...

I can't wait for that Actual Play.

"Hi, this is Ross Peyton with Roleplaying Public Radio. Joining me today are Cody, Dan, Bill, Tom, and Cyndi the Prostitute!"

LOL! I just read that with Ross' announcer voice in my head!
Why does the announcer voice sound like Troy McClure to my?
: Re: Chatting with whores
: rayner23 February 26, 2010, 02:51:13 PM
I actually chatted with a whore today who was willing to game with us, but she requires $150 (a $50 discount due to no sex!). Also, we have to go through age verification which means we have to give out a credit card number which I am not wanting to do. Call me paranoid, but I just don't trust anyone.

On the plus side, she was willing to play a half-elf druid if I would roll it up for her.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Mckma February 26, 2010, 03:12:51 PM
I actually chatted with a whore today who was willing to game with us, but she requires $150 (a $50 discount due to no sex!). Also, we have to go through age verification which means we have to give out a credit card number which I am not wanting to do. Call me paranoid, but I just don't trust anyone.

On the plus side, she was willing to play a half-elf druid if I would roll it up for her.

Bummer, maybe you'll just have to take a stroll in "that part of town."
: Re: Chatting with whores
: clockworkjoe February 26, 2010, 03:14:01 PM
(http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/5676/whatdidyousay.jpg)
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Tadanori Oyama February 26, 2010, 04:10:49 PM
(http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/5676/whatdidyousay.jpg)

He's so mad that his eyes are eating his glasses.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Boyos February 26, 2010, 10:45:32 PM
I actually chatted with a whore today who was willing to game with us, but she requires $150 (a $50 discount due to no sex!). Also, we have to go through age verification which means we have to give out a credit card number which I am not wanting to do. Call me paranoid, but I just don't trust anyone.

On the plus side, she was willing to play a half-elf druid if I would roll it up for her.

Could you use a registerd simon gift card? I know that it works for most things, you can buy all things online with it.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: BeyondSandrock February 28, 2010, 03:02:23 AM
I actually chatted with a whore today who was willing to game with us, but she requires $150 (a $50 discount due to no sex!). Also, we have to go through age verification which means we have to give out a credit card number which I am not wanting to do. Call me paranoid, but I just don't trust anyone.

On the plus side, she was willing to play a half-elf druid if I would roll it up for her.

So is the whore we're speaking of one of the species inhabiting Commercial Street, or have those all gone extinct by this point in time?
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Boyos February 28, 2010, 04:41:45 AM
I actually chatted with a whore today who was willing to game with us, but she requires $150 (a $50 discount due to no sex!). Also, we have to go through age verification which means we have to give out a credit card number which I am not wanting to do. Call me paranoid, but I just don't trust anyone.

On the plus side, she was willing to play a half-elf druid if I would roll it up for her.

So is the whore we're speaking of one of the species inhabiting Commercial Street, or have those all gone extinct by this point in time?

Last I heard theres a few still out there from the local PD, One that searches near the Sonic she will give you head if you buy her 2 Coney dogs.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Maze February 28, 2010, 12:31:03 PM
Wait a second, how does you giving your credit card can help in a age verification? I don't know about the states, but my credit card doesn't give my age and my bank covering it isn't allowed to disclose that information. What can she possibly do with your credit card beside scam you?
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Setherick February 28, 2010, 01:34:05 PM
Wait a second, how does you giving your credit card can help in a age verification? I don't know about the states, but my credit card doesn't give my age and my bank covering it isn't allowed to disclose that information. What can she possibly do with your credit card beside scam you?

You nailed it. Porn sites that ask for CCs as a way of verifying age are scams.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: rayner23 February 28, 2010, 03:34:02 PM
Wait a second, how does you giving your credit card can help in a age verification? I don't know about the states, but my credit card doesn't give my age and my bank covering it isn't allowed to disclose that information. What can she possibly do with your credit card beside scam you?

You nailed it. Porn sites that ask for CCs as a way of verifying age are scams.

And that's why I only go for free porn.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Maze February 28, 2010, 03:55:22 PM
Ah... and people stigmatized Jack the Ripper.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Kroack February 28, 2010, 04:28:53 PM
Gigady.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Tadanori Oyama March 01, 2010, 01:32:13 PM
Wait a second, how does you giving your credit card can help in a age verification? I don't know about the states, but my credit card doesn't give my age and my bank covering it isn't allowed to disclose that information. What can she possibly do with your credit card beside scam you?
You nailed it. Porn sites that ask for CCs as a way of verifying age are scams.
And that's why I only go for free porn.

This is the stuff that I wish my tech teacher in high school had taught me.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Kelkesh123 March 05, 2010, 04:44:06 PM
"Hi, this is Ross Peyton with Roleplaying Public Radio. Joining me today are Cody, Dan, Bill, Tom, and Cyndi the Prostitute!"

You forgot the customary "Alright", before he starts that up.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Tadanori Oyama March 05, 2010, 04:48:41 PM
"Hi, this is Ross Peyton with Roleplaying Public Radio. Joining me today are Cody, Dan, Bill, Tom, and Cyndi the Prostitute!"

You forgot the customary "Alright", before he starts that up.


And the ubiquitous "fair enough" at the end.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: FuzzyDan March 08, 2010, 05:37:30 AM
Sort of related to the topic,

http://dndwithpornstars.blogspot.com/ (http://dndwithpornstars.blogspot.com/)

: Re: Chatting with whores
: rayner23 March 13, 2010, 10:54:53 AM
Dammit, they beat me to the punch!
: Re: Chatting with whores
: ristarr March 13, 2010, 12:07:38 PM
I hate to say it, but playing with porn stars is way cooler than playing with whores.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Shallazar March 16, 2010, 01:20:11 AM
I hate to say it, but playing with porn stars is way cooler than playing with whores.

No way. I disbelieve. I've got 2hd that say whores > pornstars.

Pornstars are only acting, with whores there is absolutely no acting involved.

Would you play with a tranny whore?
: Re: Chatting with whores
: rayner23 March 16, 2010, 10:52:48 AM
I hate to say it, but playing with porn stars is way cooler than playing with whores.

No way. I disbelieve. I've got 2hd that say whores > pornstars.

Pornstars are only acting, with whores there is absolutely no acting involved.

Would you play with a tranny whore?

I like to think I'm a fairly progressive guy, but trannies creep me out.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Tadanori Oyama March 16, 2010, 11:14:52 AM
I like to think I'm a fairly progressive guy, but trannies creep me out.

I've found it's much simpler in other genres. Written, drawn, CGI, all pretty simple. But the real world physics of it don't always make for an appealing image. To me. I'm sure there's folks out there who are all over that.

I think that playing with a pore star would actually be just the same as playing with anybody else except you'd have seen them having sex with somebody. Depending on your group make up that might not be an unusual situation.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Doc Brown March 16, 2010, 11:27:24 AM
me: we could teach you on the first and that's totally cool, I respect you as a person as a woman to the second

Is it weird that I heard a voice that sounded a lot like Ross Payton ask for a bluff check with a -6 penalty when I read that?
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Wooberman March 16, 2010, 11:54:11 AM
me: we could teach you on the first and that's totally cool, I respect you as a person as a woman to the second

Is it weird that I heard a voice that sounded a lot like Ross Payton ask for a bluff check with a -6 penalty when I read that?

Before I found RPPR it wasn't a voice to me, it was just a compulsion. But now I have Ross, its now a voice and it sounds like him to me too!

- New Slogan -
RPPR breathing life into the voices in your head!
Or
RPPR vocalising your inner demons
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Kroack March 16, 2010, 05:40:42 PM
We got to get a whole list of slogans, have Ross read them in his announcer voice, and then gift them to Tom a birthday present.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Setherick March 16, 2010, 05:48:15 PM
We got to get a whole list of slogans, have Ross read them in his announcer voice, and then gift them to Tom a birthday present.

Tom is immortal, he existed before time began.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Shallazar March 17, 2010, 12:42:41 AM
We got to get a whole list of slogans, have Ross read them in his announcer voice, and then gift them to Tom a birthday present.

Tom is immortal, he existed before time began.
THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!

Tom is older than the Old Ones.
and greater than the great old ones.

In the beginning there was Tom, and it was AWESOME!
: Re: Chatting with whores
: rayner23 March 18, 2010, 11:52:42 AM
I'm SO TIRED of topics being derailed on these boards!!!!!

Can't we just get back to talking about whores?!
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Tadanori Oyama March 18, 2010, 12:06:23 PM
Well I ran out of things to say regarding whores awhile. Thought we where doing alright with the comparing whores and pornstars bit.

Has anybody tried getting an "escort" instead? It's alot more experience but they might be more willing to work with the situation.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Setherick March 18, 2010, 12:11:17 PM
I'm SO TIRED of topics being derailed on these boards!!!!!

Can't we just get back to talking about whores?!

(http://i302.photobucket.com/albums/nn119/Setherick/AlmostDerailed.jpg)
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Boyos March 18, 2010, 12:14:16 PM
Its sad that even if you pay somone you cant convince them to be the healer.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Tadanori Oyama March 18, 2010, 12:20:27 PM
Its sad that even if you pay somone you cant convince them to be the healer.

Maybe you just have to find the right whore? One who already does roleplaying, ideally as a nurse or something medical. That way they can blend into the game easier.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Boyos March 18, 2010, 12:26:43 PM
You know, I bet you could convince a gigolo to play, Most guys like playing RPGS.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Tadanori Oyama March 18, 2010, 12:32:04 PM
You know, I bet you could convince a gigolo to play, Most guys like playing RPGS.

Right but "D&D Gigolo" doesn't have the same ring to it as "D&D Whore".

Maybe it's the game selection. Think a whore would like Call of Cthulhu better?
: Re: Chatting with whores
: ShotgunSurgeon March 18, 2010, 01:25:51 PM
Would paying a whore to play RIFTS or Synnibar be considered abuse? I mean smacking a bitch is one thing . . . but nobody deserves Synnibar.

Do pimps get to play? If so, I'm saying wizard (for the staff) or thief (for obvious reasons).
: Re: Chatting with whores
: rayner23 March 18, 2010, 02:32:16 PM
I imagine I would have a hard time finding a giggolo in Springfield, MO. Then again, I could be wrong.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Tadanori Oyama March 18, 2010, 02:40:58 PM
I imagine I would have a hard time finding a giggolo in Springfield, MO. Then again, I could be wrong.

This would be a good set up if I know any of the RPPR players better.

Since I don't, I'm just gonna accuse Jason.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Boyos March 18, 2010, 08:21:13 PM
I imagine I would have a hard time finding a giggolo in Springfield, MO. Then again, I could be wrong.

I know some man whores but no giggolos.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Tadanori Oyama March 19, 2010, 11:07:23 AM
I imagine I would have a hard time finding a giggolo in Springfield, MO. Then again, I could be wrong.

I know some man whores but no giggolos.

I know, I don't even know any really good giggolo jokes. I'm trying to think of some but I keep coming back to pimp lines and it's just not the same thing.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: ristarr March 19, 2010, 08:39:31 PM
Just saw a new post on the dnd with pornstars blog (http://dndwithpornstars.blogspot.com/?zx=dcc9a3f0844dfa42 (http://dndwithpornstars.blogspot.com/?zx=dcc9a3f0844dfa42)) that may be pertinent to the conversation:

Some confusion has arisen concerning nomenclature, allow me to explain:

Most people decide that they want to have sex with you before having sex with you

Whores decide they don't want to have sex with you before having sex with you,

Porn performers decide whether they want to have sex with you while having sex with you.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Shallazar March 20, 2010, 06:01:15 PM
Just saw a new post on the dnd with pornstars blog (http://dndwithpornstars.blogspot.com/?zx=dcc9a3f0844dfa42 (http://dndwithpornstars.blogspot.com/?zx=dcc9a3f0844dfa42)) that may be pertinent to the conversation:

Some confusion has arisen concerning nomenclature, allow me to explain:

Most people decide that they want to have sex with you before having sex with you

Whores decide they don't want to have sex with you before having sex with you,

Porn performers decide whether they want to have sex with you while having sex with you.

I rest my case.

On a side note, i'll curb my derailery.

What about just paying SOMEONE, not a whore perse, but someone who normally would not play. A DnD whore, they only play DnD for money, like some obviously slutty chick or something. Do they have to be a professional whore?
: Re: Chatting with whores
: ShotgunSurgeon March 20, 2010, 06:42:30 PM
What about just paying SOMEONE, not a whore perse, but someone who normally would not play. A DnD whore, they only play DnD for money, like some obviously slutty chick or something. Do they have to be a professional whore?

Hmmm... in my college days, my gaming group definitely was able to draw people in with free pizza, etc. Not sure if they wouldn't have played eventually, but the freebies were the lure. Definitely not slutty chicks in that bunch though.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Setherick March 20, 2010, 07:46:25 PM
What about just paying SOMEONE, not a whore perse, but someone who normally would not play. A DnD whore, they only play DnD for money, like some obviously slutty chick or something. Do they have to be a professional whore?

Hmmm... in my college days, my gaming group definitely was able to draw people in with free pizza, etc. Not sure if they wouldn't have played eventually, but the freebies were the lure. Definitely not slutty chicks in that bunch though.

(http://i302.photobucket.com/albums/nn119/Setherick/529200843439PM_Hope.jpg)
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Boyos March 20, 2010, 10:56:10 PM
HOW DID YOU KNOW I HAD A 12 LEVEL PALLY!
: Re: Chatting with whores
: rayner23 March 21, 2010, 10:11:11 PM
I kind of want the whore to be professional just to add to the authenticity of it all.

: Re: Chatting with whores
: Tadanori Oyama March 22, 2010, 12:22:30 PM
I kind of want the whore to be professional just to add to the authenticity of it all.

Than you need to learn the Tiger Woods lesson: you have to pay for professionalism or things will get out of your control.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Kroack March 22, 2010, 07:06:10 PM
No no no. If you are a professional you get lots of pussy. That's the TW lesson. 
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Tadanori Oyama March 22, 2010, 07:15:10 PM
No no no. If you are a professional you get lots of pussy. That's the TW lesson. 

Yes, but then the lots of pussy rats you out to your wife and the press because it got emotional. There really was a piece out this on NPR a few months back. The consultant they had in studio talked about how "smart" celerbrites who want to cheap make sure they hire "escorts" and higher cost pussy because there's a professional code of 'ethics' that goes along with the job.

At the lower levels you don't have that and people get emotional, which leads to you standing like a dim wit on ESPN apologising endlessly over and over to everybody and your former buddies taking away your shoes because you've been revealed for the fraud that you are.

Happens all the time.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: +1 Hat March 23, 2010, 02:56:47 AM
*Cut to Camera #3, Anchor turns head 60° right*

In related news, the makers of Playing D&D With Pornstars, in association with The Escapist, bring you their further adventures, vlogged:

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/i-hit-it-with-my-axe/1533-Episode-One-Meet-the-Party

Sources close to the creators have stated the second episode is set to be much improved, and at least a little fucking coherent, dammit.

And now, a word from our sponsors:

Pussyfarts.

*Cut to commercial*
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Sean-o-tron March 23, 2010, 03:31:32 AM
"And now an announcement from the National Apple Association:
'FUCK PEARS.'"
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Wooberman March 23, 2010, 03:54:48 AM
*Cut to Camera #3, Anchor turns head 60° right*

In related news, the makers of Playing D&D With Pornstars, in association with The Escapist, bring you their further adventures, vlogged:

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/i-hit-it-with-my-axe/1533-Episode-One-Meet-the-Party

Sources close to the creators have stated the second episode is set to be much improved, and at least a little fucking coherent, dammit.

And now, a word from our sponsors:

Pussyfarts.

*Cut to commercial*

One of the most surreal videos i've ever seen in my entire life!
"I've seen her before... and that one... wait no! No freaking way!!"
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Boyos March 23, 2010, 02:48:08 PM
is it a dream or a nightmare.... Im not sure yet!
: Re: Chatting with whores
: malyss March 26, 2010, 01:55:51 PM
Conversations with whores are not usually that interesting...

And I guarantee, every single last one of them has a couple of STDs.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Boyos March 26, 2010, 07:13:16 PM
as long as its not dragon syphilis or vorpral gangrene, they will be happy.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Tadanori Oyama March 26, 2010, 07:14:26 PM
as long as its not dragon syphilis or vorpral gangrene, they will be happy.

Well, not dead maybe but I wouldn't say happy exactly.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Maze March 27, 2010, 01:54:34 AM
Holy shit. Sasha Grey, Mandy Morbid? Last I saw those two they were in a shower together.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Dogfish March 27, 2010, 10:02:43 AM
Holy shit. Sasha Grey, Mandy Morbid? Last I saw those two they were in a shower together.

Where! I mean...ugh...cards on the table now.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Boyos March 27, 2010, 03:10:27 PM
Holy shit. Sasha Grey, Mandy Morbid? Last I saw those two they were in a shower together.

DING DING DING, somone watches his porn! haha! Mandy morbids blog is depressing! but great shots on there.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Wooberman March 29, 2010, 03:02:18 AM
Holy shit. Sasha Grey, Mandy Morbid? Last I saw those two they were in a shower together.

DING DING DING, somone watches his porn! haha! Mandy morbids blog is depressing! but great shots on there.

Erm...

(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_0e6xtb7f2RU/S5IVZBJyawI/AAAAAAAAAUY/pm2AhviCk-w/s400/mmorbid_07242009_086.jpg)

Is Mandy Morbid a fembot because i'm pretty sure the position of her arm to the rest of her body is practically impossible
: Re: Chatting with whores
: clockworkjoe March 29, 2010, 03:06:08 AM
That's her boyfriend's arm.
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Wooberman March 29, 2010, 05:52:44 AM
I'm not sure if i'm relieved or disappointed  :-\
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Maze March 29, 2010, 11:50:41 AM
Disappointed. That she can't do that, and that she has a boyfriend.

Edit: Thanks for pointing out she had a blog. I quite like it.

Another edit: http://www.whackmagazine.com/2010/03/mandy-morbid-bra-size-is-28ff-or-28-gh.html
: Re: Chatting with whores
: Murph March 31, 2010, 05:47:18 PM
http://gamecrush.presslift.com/gamecrush-spices-up-online-gaming-with-new-site

I wonder if they will have a D&d option