Ummm. Umm umm um.
I don't like being 'that guy' but damn am I going to be that guy.
I took a look through this, not by any means a detailed one, and I have a few observations, questions, and suggestions. This will likely come across as over-critical, but there's no helping that.
First off, have someone look over this to edit it for you. There are some places I had to read over a few times just to make any sense out of them.
Next, a lot of this feels reeeeally unfinished. Each racial group has several unique abilities, but nowhere in the document is there any description of what precisely they 'do'. To wit:
'However every two levels, [the Ensethians] must lose their previous and too small flesh for a
new one that has been modified in one of two methods (Armor or Weaponry).
It was for this evolutionary capability that they had been sought after by the
Repthians to fight with them in the decade long Hybrid Revolution. '
All well and good, but this is the only place it's mentioned - what exactly does this ability do?
Spells and prayers are loosely defined as well - when you use a spell with a range of, say, 1d4 squares, do you roll that each time you cast it? What happens if I fall short? Do I miss, or is it not used up?
Further, and this may be a matter of personal taste, this does not read like a sci-fi setting. This, based purely on mechanics and the layout of equipment and powers, feels much more like swords 'n' sorcery IN SPAAAAAAAACE...
Which can be fine, but make sure you mention that. And the fact that this is a playtest document definitely means you don't need the two-page introduction explaining in exhausting and slightly erratic detail what a roleplaying game is. We're gamers, thus the podcast, thus the forums. We don't need that particular concept explained to us.
Looking forward to your thoughts! It's definitely interesting, I'll give you that.
