Author Topic: Nerdcore rap battle  (Read 5190 times)

Murph

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Nerdcore rap battle
« on: February 16, 2010, 09:57:43 PM »
I'd thought I'd share whats currently going on in my status on Facebook.  The names have been changed to protect the nerdy

Murph Challenges you to a 48 hour poetry slam. Who is steppin' What, What, Uh uh. Turn that shit up... You foo's got nothing on M C Wizard Dissle I spit rhymes like I cast magic missile. I roll all 4s and knock you on your ass You took all 10 levels in the pussy prestige classes SNAP
 

Ryan oh shit this mf is tripping. allow me to reiterate the obvious..

i've got skill points higher than a bard can count
i've got gold pieces stacked like they can't run out
i've got fly ass shorties love to notch my bow
and i'm not talkin bout rangers you should already know
i don't hate on a playa trying to multi class
but i stick with what i know, and that's getting ass
so if you try to step to me you better roll a crit
cause you've got one free action before i bring my shit
it's nasty, legendary skills and stacked feats
crack open an epic level handbook to compete
my character sheet got more ink than a yakuza
so if you want to back down i'll be happy to excuse ya
what. uh.
Yesterday at 9:43pm

Kevin what's that you flapping your gums at me son, now it is on and your time is done. I spit rhyme with flow and power, this ain't your weakass amateur hour. I'm a lyrical genius the monster of rock, rolling all nat 20s with my 10 inch jock. Not only outrhyme I also outgame you, now sit down son i am the beast that tamed you.
Yesterday at 9:45pm

JD I'm down right fierce, like a hadoken.... BOOM!
Yesterday at 11:04pm



Murph Looks like Ive got challengers, but the CR's to low
Step off now before I send you to that plane below
I'm so decked out I DE legendary
I've killed everything in all bestiary
You try for a quarterturn punch
ATOMIC PILEDRIVER Motherfucka, now gimme your lunch
You try playing magic, all your monster's attack
Too late mother fucker, I put my dick on the stack
Its a 20 HD monster of size gargantuan
Hits the table, destroying your battle plan
I've got bitches in all of the crystal planes
Faerun, Dominera, Azeroth, wenchesl scream my name
Your mother I've got on farm like some kind of crop
Her panties are a 100 percent drop
I've got more astral diamonds then you got excuses
I walk Tyrannosaurs, I swim in gray oozes
I drink Cristal with Vecna, Fuck nymphs with Kord
All the demi-bitches want a ride on my sword
So come and try and aggro me
All you end up doing is losing h.p.
3 hours ago



Matthew
Look at whiteys rappin thinkin they got game
But i'mma drop it on ya facebook like i got no shame
Because this fantasy is final, yeah i pulled your cord
Your bitches call me from beyond just like a ouiji board
You dealin 24bit, this is real 3-D
Surround sound in dolby-digital cause ya'll know me
We don't play, so press escape before your pride get hurt
I got your Linux shooting sparks, maybe it's time you convert
Upgrade to MC, because your rom is lame
I got you blowing in my cartridge, won't fix your game
How bout you kiddies stick to pokemon or magic cards
My disc is spinnin on the level, and i play on hard
What.
about an hour ago

Ryan oh snap cabbil unleashed the dragon
about an hour ago

Mike Fo this punishment y'all gonna be gluttons
Hit you with a fierce kick worthy of the Y buttons
Uppercut, mothafucka, you bet that shit is toasty
28d10 flame breath you bet that shit is roasty
Talkin all big like you wield some kinda power,...
See More
57 minutes ago



Murph I can summon the pit lords, the demons of rap
My dick can form a COP:Evil to entrap
I use angelic hosts to carry my cup
Mana from heaven as a bust a nut
You think you you are the master blaster?
Thats shits won't last yah
You probably still have an atari six thousand
I blow you away at Halo, my joystick in hand
I lay the smack down with my 100 inch plasma tv
Its almost as big as my johnson
I get as many kills with it as my thompson submachine gun
You say you play hard, but you got nothing to speak of
I'm badder than Corey with that battle glove
Shit, did I just drop a The Wizard reference
Next I'll be telling you your mother is my sexual preference
My power level is over 90 Gs
All you bitches better get on your knees

Word.

Kroack

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Re: Nerdcore rap battle
« Reply #1 on: February 17, 2010, 03:04:04 PM »
You guys might have just listed ever single trope of gaming in your rap war. 

KallMeKip

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Re: Nerdcore rap battle
« Reply #2 on: February 17, 2010, 06:50:53 PM »
*bows*

Maze

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Re: Nerdcore rap battle
« Reply #3 on: February 18, 2010, 11:16:56 AM »
this is so awesome I won't bother using a capital at the beginning of my sentence.

Murph

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Re: Nerdcore rap battle
« Reply #4 on: February 18, 2010, 11:31:16 AM »
The battle is now over, I'll post the rest of the comments when I get off of work.

Murph

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Re: Nerdcore rap battle
« Reply #5 on: February 19, 2010, 04:17:22 PM »
Ryan oh shit this mf is tripping. allow me to reiterate the obvious..

i've got skill points higher than a bard can count
i've got gold pieces stacked like they can't run out
i've got fly ass shorties love to notch my bow
and i'm not talkin bout rangers you should already know
i don't hate on a playa trying to multi class
but i stick with what i know, and that's getting ass
so if you try to step to me you better roll a crit
cause you've got one free action before i bring my shit
it's nasty, legendary skills and stacked feats
crack open an epic level handbook to compete
my character sheet got more ink than a yakuza
so if you want to back down i'll be happy to excuse ya
what. uh.
February 15 at 9:43pm

Kevin what's that you flapping your gums at me son, now it is on and your time is done. I spit rhyme with flow and power, this ain't your weakass amateur hour. I'm a lyrical genius the monster of rock, rolling all nat 20s with my 10 inch jock. Not only outrhyme I also outgame you, now sit down son i am the beast that tamed you.
February 15 at 9:45pm

JD I'm down right fierce, like a hadoken.... BOOM!
February 15 at 11:04pm

Murph  Looks like Ive got challengers, but the CR's to low
Step off now before I send you to that plane below
I'm so decked out I DE legendary
I've killed everything in all bestiary
You try for a quarterturn punch
ATOMIC PILEDRIVER Motherfucka, now gimme your lunch
You try playing magic, all your monster's attack
Too late mother fucker, I put my dick on the stack
Its a 20 HD monster of size gargantuan
Hits the table, destroying your battle plan
I've got bitches in all of the crystal planes
Faerun, Dominera, Azeroth, wenchesl scream my name
Your mother I've got on farm like some kind of crop
Her panties are a 100 percent drop
I've got more astral diamonds then you got excuses
I walk Tyrannosaurs, I swim in gray oozes
I drink Cristal with Vecna, Fuck nymphs with Kord
All the demi-bitches want a ride on my sword
So come and try and aggro me
All you end up doing is losing h.p.
Tue at 6:11pm



Matthew
Look at whiteys rappin thinkin they got game
But i'mma drop it on ya facebook like i got no shame
Because this fantasy is final, yeah i pulled your cord
Your bitches call me from beyond just like a ouiji board
You dealin 24bit, this is real 3-D
Surround sound in dolby-digital cause ya'll know me
We don't play, so press escape before your pride get hurt
I got your Linux shooting sparks, maybe it's time you convert
Upgrade to MC, because your rom is lame
I got you blowing in my cartridge, won't fix your game
How bout you kiddies stick to pokemon or magic cards
My disc is spinnin on the level, and i play on hard
What.
Tue at 8:51pm

Mike Fo this punishment y'all gonna be gluttons
Hit you with a fierce kick worthy of the Y buttons
Uppercut, mothafucka, you bet that shit is toasty
28d10 flame breath you bet that shit is roasty
Talkin all big like you wield some kinda power,
I burn all yo asses up with a single meteor shower.
You talk shit, you talk big, that's all that you know
Bitch, you betta be prepared to make a saving throw.
CLACK CLACK, just like that, you know we didn't need ya
Rollin' deep with my crown royal bag of polyhedra.
I got my holy sword, strollin with my warhorse
Collected every single piece of every single triforce
So before you approach and make your initiative roll
Just go ahead and walk away through this Dimension Do'
I'll even provide it for ya, I'm the soul of courtesy
I'm neutral good, I'm just trying to prevent a tragedy.
Tue at 8:57pm



Murph I can summon the pit lords, the demons of rap
My dick can form a COP:Evil to entrap
I use angelic hosts to carry my cup
Mana from heaven as a bust a nut
You think you you are the master blaster?
Thats shits won't last yah
You probably still have an atari six thousand
I blow you away at Halo, my joystick in hand
I lay the smack down with my 100 inch plasma tv
Its almost as big as my johnson
I get as many kills with it as my thompson submachine gun
You say you play hard, but you got nothing to speak of
I'm badder than Corey with that battle glove
Shit, did I just drop a The Wizard reference
Next I'll be telling you your mother is my sexual preference
My power level is over 90 Gs
All you bitches better get on your knees

Word.
Tue at 9:40pm



Matthew I know ya tryin real hard, Watch you break a sweat
Maybe you should stand up, cause your backs all wet
I see you pullin out "The Wizard," yeah you talk mad shit
But Ninja Gaiden mothafuckah that's as far as you get
I see you in ya momma's basement Wit'cha whole damn crew
When she kick you out, Tell me what are you gon'do
You got a first class mage, Like to weild a mace
But I keep droppin phoenix downs just like i own the place
Now you get-tin mad, fightin like you in Helms Deep
You know your 40 hours in, and now you got to pee
Don't blink, I think, you may just have a chance
your thumbs are bleedin, button mashin by the seat of your pants
eyes red, party dead, you're in your Final Bout
Because the only way that you can win is by ring out
Round 3 to me, watch me while i cast mad haste
Lay this game to waste, Bust a nut all ova-ya-face
Should you continue? I will give you to the count of ten
And when you come back I'ma kick your ass all over again
WHAT!
Tue at 10:13pm

Ryan all you bustas need to settle down
there's plenty of dick to go around
pull up a chair it's story time
better yet sit on my lap feel why your momma cries
gamers across the globe all know my name
meet me at the table and shit's never the same
this is my hood lil pimpin and you know i'm the shit
that's why name's in lights on the high score list
i drop
mad combos like you just can't break em
crazy aggro know you just can't shake em
play games like you'd think i make em
but you know i get paid so when i want em i take em
dps that's dick per second
looks like i'm trying to set a record
got all of my toolbars macro'd
split second reaction better keep it factored
pvp me if you gotta but you know i'm better
all day in the auction house stackin cheddar
gold in my mailbox like i got connections
and my dick's a landmark, ask a guard for direction
Tue at 10:26pm



Geoff Representing H-Town, my name is G-Dizzle
Remove your target and make yo' spell fizzle
You act all scared and bust a nut,
That's ok, shit happens when I play the Butt.
Call a judge when the game state's messy
Say yo a cheater worse than Uncle Jesse.
Make a big scene and tell me I gots to go
Turn around and I'm banging yo' ho'
All you mother fckers best be terrified like on Halloween, Boo!
I'ma school you all and win this PTQ.

Word Dawg
Tue at 11:02pm

Ryan Simmons ohhh shit gdizzle reppin the dirty dirty down in houston
Tue at 11:03pm

Murph Awwww shit, all you scrubs is getting restless
Best take a seat, before you fail a saving throw

I roll around with strippers in a apparatus of Kwalish
My posse rolls with a dwarf that fucks up faces with his plus seven maul
I make it rain, without applications of control weather
I throw a party and even the dead there
My glock hits on a two, crits on a three
One swing of my cock cuts down the Yggdrasil tree
I party all over with the King in Yellow
Cthulu and me wrestle mermaids in jello
He comes from the city under the sea
There we party hard, getting blowjobs from banshees
My paragon path was to fuck your mom
After I finished she flew up like I cast Living bomb
I learned that move from Baron Geddon
As we chilled in Molton Core, getting our drink on
I get crunk with all the Nordic gods
A nickname for my dick is the immovable rod
Thor and I roll out with the thunder
We fuck with all you scrubs, ninja loot all the plunder
Roll back to Azgard, see those valkyrie tits
All the while thrulls come out of my breeding pit
We roll across Dominera cause I got a Bad Moon
Eternally on the quest for more poon
We quickly reduce your life total to one
One last attack, your fuck done.

Word.

Maze

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Re: Nerdcore rap battle
« Reply #6 on: February 21, 2010, 01:43:41 AM »
Pretty sweet. Good job.

I think it's pretty sad that I know almost all the references you guys are making.