Author Topic: The Future of Former President Martin Van Buren  (Read 12630 times)

doctorscraps

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The Future of Former President Martin Van Buren
« on: April 02, 2010, 08:24:57 PM »
Thanks to Cody Walkers work in "Dodge Ball to Save the Planet" as superhuman Martin Van Buren, the character has taken a life of it's own amongst my friends.

It all began when my brother introduced me to a game they simply called "The Game", where you tell a story based around everyone playing each other in a situation, where you draw cards, and depending the card drawn, you have to do terrible terrible things to either yourself or another player...the last one standing by the ending of the deck of cards being the winner. Naturally, there was a lot of Chuck Norris, Morgan Freeman, and Neil Patrick Harris cameos...

Then...one fated session, I went first, and dammit all if I didn't drawn a King of Spades. Meaning I had to do something really...really bad to myself right off the bat. It had to be bone jarring, it had to be blood splattering...
So...I had Curtis the Blonde Asshole run me over in a red sportscar, accompanied by Former President Martin Van Buren. What escalated afterwards was a fight breaking out between Curtis and my brothers character and into a Cheese-Cake factory...Where Chuck Norris just happened to be enjoying some Cheese cake.
My turn again...
And thus, Van Buren locked eyes with Chuck Norris, and they commenced to do battle with one another in an epic free-for-all, fueled by some yet unspoken grudge held against one another.

Since that session, I have gone on to use Former President Martin Van Buren on many occasions in many RPG's, even going so far as to plan a book, detailing the adventures of Former President Martin Van Buren, the Cosmic Warrior, as he journeys across the stars in a space-faring spanish Ghalleon with his buddies Captain Jake the Whizpan, and his stalwart apprentice, Brian the Sexsaber.

In short...Thank you, Cody...You have inadvertedly given birth to the destroyer of worlds.
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Kroack

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Re: The Future of Former President Martin Van Buren
« Reply #1 on: April 02, 2010, 09:26:25 PM »
It's only through Cody's demented mind we can have wonders such as president Martin Van Buren.


Setherick

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Re: The Future of Former President Martin Van Buren
« Reply #2 on: April 02, 2010, 10:31:21 PM »
Do you guys know anything about the 1830s and 1840s? Martin Van Buren was one of the worst Presidents ever. The depression that resulted from his continuing of Andrew Jackson's economic policies resulted in a depression that made the current one look like a minor blip.
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Murph

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Re: The Future of Former President Martin Van Buren
« Reply #3 on: April 02, 2010, 11:17:23 PM »
Federalist lies

Tadanori Oyama

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Re: The Future of Former President Martin Van Buren
« Reply #4 on: April 03, 2010, 12:06:21 AM »
He ran again, too. I've been looking some of this stuff up. In 1848 (I think), he ran on a third party ticket for the Free Soil Party, a New York politicial party which opposed slavery in the western territories because it meant black people would steal jobs from white people. He won 10% of the popluar vote.

Dawnsteel

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Re: The Future of Former President Martin Van Buren
« Reply #5 on: April 03, 2010, 12:11:58 AM »
STUPID COMMENT REMOVED.
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Kroack

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Re: The Future of Former President Martin Van Buren
« Reply #6 on: April 03, 2010, 12:17:56 AM »
Do you guys know anything about the 1830s and 1840s? Martin Van Buren was one of the worst Presidents ever. The depression that resulted from his continuing of Andrew Jackson's economic policies resulted in a depression that made the current one look like a minor blip.



Former Clown Martin Van Bozo is laughing at you right now.

Cuz he knows all Federalists burn in hell for their sins.

Fucker.

Setherick

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Re: The Future of Former President Martin Van Buren
« Reply #7 on: April 03, 2010, 09:51:31 AM »
Federalist lies

Van Buren was the Ford of the 1830/40s.
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rayner23

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Re: The Future of Former President Martin Van Buren
« Reply #8 on: April 05, 2010, 10:58:56 AM »
Federalist lies

Van Buren was the Ford of the 1830/40s.

I expect no less from the President with the greatest haircut of all time.
I'm from Alaska. About Fifty miles south of Ankorage there's a little fishing town, maybe you've heard of it, it's called fuck your momma.