The Corrupt A Wish Thread

[Setherick]

I wish my fiance wasn't going to get downsized in a month.

Granted, however, she has now been down-sized, meaning she only stands 2" tall.

I wish I had a Blendtec blender so I could blend crazy things.

[Dawnsteel]

I wish I had a Blendtec blender so I could blend crazy things.

Granted, but this is a prototype model, and the carafe and its blades are made of Nerf.

I wish I hadn't coated myself in gasoline yesterday.

[Tadanori Oyama]

I wish I hadn't coated myself in gasoline yesterday.

Granted, you evaded the gasolne. However without the smell masking your scent nothing prevented the bear from finding you.

I wish I had a sandwich.

[FuzzyDan]

I wish I had a sandwich.

Granted, but eating that KFC Double Down was just enough to trigger five consecutive heart attacks.

I wish I had the time and players to host all the games I wanted.

[acronomicon]

I wish I had the time and players to host all the games I wanted.

Granted, but they're all mix/maxing rules lawyers that view every hiccup in the game as a personal attack against themselves...and the extra time comes from chronic insomnia driving you insane.

I wish I had a turkey sandwich, on rye bread, with lettuce and mustard, and, AND I don't want any zombie turkeys, I don't want to turn into a turkey myself, and I don't want any other weird surprises.

[Tadanori Oyama]

I wish I had a turkey sandwich, on rye bread, with lettuce and mustard, and, AND I don't want any zombie turkeys, I don't want to turn into a turkey myself, and I don't want any other weird surprises.

Granted. Though the turkey is a little dry.

I wish my employer enjoyed my epic wit as much as I do.

[Setherick]

I wish my employer enjoyed my epic wit as much as I do.

Granted, you're employer is now Joseph Addison. He makes you work a hand press while you tell him witty things. He then takes credit for your ideas.

I wish Order66 would read the first thread.

[Kroack]

Hey guys, lets ignore old asshole66, okay?

I wish Order66 would read the first thread.

Granted, but the effort he exerted in reading that small amount literally blinded him. Good job, I hope you're happy.

I wish that the RIFTS system was better. 

[Setherick]

I wish that the RIFTS system was better. 

Granted, it's now a better version of Synnibar.

I wish I hadn't made a Synnibar joke.

[ugnis13]

[/quote]

I wish I hadn't made a Synnibar joke.
[/quote]


Granted. Instead it was a F.A.T.A.L joke.
I wish one of my lottery tickets wins

[Dawnsteel]

I wish one of my lottery tickets wins

Granted!  By a staggering coincidence, 1,8400,000 people picked the same winning numbers.  Your total payoff: $0.17, after taxes.

I wish I had a chilled glass of pinot grigio.

[Boyos]

Granted, but since I have no clue what Pinot Grigio is, you get some Skunky beer.

I wish I had a nice Sam Adams Summer Ale.

[Dawnsteel]

I wish I had a nice Sam Adams Summer Ale.

Granted.  The bottle is ice-cold, but the cap is not twist-off.  You don't have a bottle opener, and the table in front of you has rounded edges.

I wish I'd remember to add my wish before I post these.

[Arje]

I wish I'd remember to add my wish before I post these.

Granted, but you've used the brainspace that you used to use to remember how to breath.

I wish Kick-Ass was out this weekend instead of next.

[ugnis13]

[/quote]



I wish Kick-Ass was out this weekend instead of next.
[/quote]

Granted, but it came out at the same time as the next Twilight movie, so you have to wait in lines next to their fans.

I wish i could learn how to quote properly