Omegle - for all your random chat trolling

[crash2455]

I wanted to Zalgo Omegle but they don't support the font.

[clockworkjoe]

You: PARKER! GET IN MY OFFICE
You: WHERE ARE THOSE NEW SPIDERMAN PHOTOS
Stranger: im sorry
Stranger: im too drunk to think of a funny reply
You: DAMNIT PARKER
You: WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT DRINKING ON THE JOB
You: ONLY I CAN DO THAT
Stranger:
You: YOU SHOULD BE FROWNING
Stranger:
You: IF I DON'T GET NEW PHOTOS OF SPIDERMAN
You: YOU WILL BE FIRED
Stranger: ok im going tyo sleep
You: PARKER!
You: TELL MISS BRANT TO GET ME MY COFFEE
Stranger: im not parker
You: WHAT?
You: STOP SCREWING AROUND PARKER
You: IF YOU CAN'T GET THE PHOTOS I'LL REHIRE BROCK
You: SPIDERMAN IS A MENACE TO SOCIETY

[clockworkjoe]

Stranger: yo
You: PARKER! GET IN MY OFFICE NOW
You: WHERE ARE THOSE SPIDERMAN PHOTOS?
Stranger: on my computer at home sir ill have them in tomorrow
You: WE HAVE A DEADLINE TO MEET PARKER
You: DO YOU WANT TO KEEP YOUR JOB?
Stranger: no because im...................batman
You: WHAT? QUIT MAKING SCREWY JOKES PARKER
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[rayner23]

This one is fucking epic.


You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: PARKER! I NEED YOU IN MY OFFICE NOW!
Stranger: hey, if youre looking for sex, please disconnect me:]
Stranger: OKAAAY THATS NOT SEXUAL
You: NOT AT ALL LOOKING FOR SEX!
You: NO TIME FOR SEX, PARKER!
You: I NEED THOSE PICTURES OF SPIDER-MAN!
You: WE'VE GOT A PAPER TO RUN!
Stranger: HAHA I DIDNT GET THEM:(
You: WHAT?!
You: DO YOU WANT TO LOSE YOUR JOB, PARKER!?
Stranger: NO I WANT YOU TO LOSE YOUR JOB
You: DO YOU WANT ME TO HAVE EDDIE BROCK DO YOUR JOB FOR YOU?!
Stranger: THE PUBLIC WILL BLAME YOU
You: I OWN THIS PAPER, PARKER!
Stranger: YOU HAVE OBVIOUSLY WATCHED THIS MOVIE ALOT
You: I'M J. JONAH JAMESON!
You: I OWN THIS TOWN!
You: I'M SICK AND TIRED OF YOUR LIP, PARKER!
You: YOU'RE FIRED!
Stranger: I OWN MYSELF SO STFU AND GO AWAY
You: YOU'LL BE OWNING NOTHING WHEN I'M DONE WITH YOU PARKER!
You: I'LL RUIN YOUR NAME!
You: I'LL ENSURE THAT EVEN THE FREE PRESS WON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU!
Stranger: AT LEAST MY NAMES NOT ALREADY RUINED LIKE YOURS
You: I'LL CARVE YOUR NAME INTO THE MOON WITH THE SAYING "EVERYONE HATE PETER PARKER!"
You: IF I HAVE TO!
Stranger: ILL CARVE YOUR NAME INTO YOUR ASSS.
You: YOU GOT MOXIE, KID
You: YOU'RE HIRED AGAIN!
You: NOW GET OUT THERE AND GET ME SOME PICTURES OF SPIDER-MAN!
You: I NEED THOSE PICTURES SO WE CAN SHOW THE PUBLIC WHAT A MENACE HE IS!
You: AND TELL MS. BRANT TO GET ME MY COFFEE!
Stranger: OKAY HERES THE THING
Stranger: MY MOXIES KICKING IN AND I DONT WANNA TELL ANYONE TO GET YOU A COFFEE
You: WHERE'S THE THING?
You: HE'S AT FANTASTIC FOUR'S TOWER!
Stranger: NO HES IN YOUR MOMS BED
Stranger: OHHH BURNN
You: GLORIA JAMESON WAS A SAINT!
You: A SAINT!!!!!
You: YOU'RE FIRED PARKER!
You: I'M SO SICK OF YOUR SMART ASS ATTITUDE!
Stranger: YOURE FIRED!
You: YOU'LL NEVER WORK IN THIS TOWN AGAIN!
Stranger: GET OUT I RUN THIS PAPER NOW
You: YOU CAN'T FIRE ME! I OWN THE PAPER!
You: YOU CLEARLY HAVE A MENTAL IMBALANCE, THEREFORE I AM GOING TO HIRE YOU AGAIN
You: SO THAT YOU CAN HAVE HEALTH INSURANCE SO YOU CAN TAKE CARE OF YOURSELD
You: YOURSELF
You: I CARE PARKER
Stranger: THAT IS CLEARLY THE TYPE OF DECISION MAKING THAT GOT YOU YOUR JOB AS BOSS
You: STOP DOING DRUGS, PARKER
You: THAT GANJA IS GOING STRAIGHT TO YOUR HEAD
Stranger: STOP SMOKINGGG
You: YOU'RE NEVER GOING TO GET A CLEAR SHOT OF SPIDER-MAN IF YOU ACT LIKE THAT!
Stranger: ITS BAD FOR YOUR LUNGS</3
Stranger: YOURE NEVER GONNA GET A CLEAR SHOT AT MY ASS IF YOU IGNORE ME
You: AND I NEED A CLEAR SHOT OF SPIDER-MAN BECAUSE I HAVE TO SHOW THE CITY WHAT A MENACE HE IS!
You: I'M NOT IGNORING YOU PARKER!
You: YOU'RE A VALUABLE MEMBER OF THE BUGLE'S STAFF!
You: NOW GET OUT THERE AND GET ME SOME PICTURES!
Stranger: GET IT YOURSELF IF YOURE THE BOSS
You: I'M BUSY EDITING THIS PAPER!
Stranger: LETS SWITCH JOBS
Stranger: SEE HOW TOUGH IT IS
You: MY JOB IS REALLY TOUGH BECAUSE I HAVE TO DEAL WITH PUNKS LIKE YOU!!!
You: YOU'RE FIRED AGAIN PARKER!
You: MENTAL HEALTH BE DAMNED, YOU'RE DRIVING ME NUTS!
Stranger: YOURE FIRED, WETHER I DRIVE YOU NUTS ORNOT
You: I'm tired of this game. Wanna have some cyber sex?
Stranger: haha not reallly, did you not read my intro:/
You: I slowly take off your pants
You: kissing your neck sensuously
Stranger: ..?
Stranger: i saidd no
You: I massage your breasts
You: and nibble your ear lobes
Stranger: I kick your ass and piss on you.
Stranger: burnn
You: yeah baby
You: keep it up
Stranger: you are a strange person
You: then, I feel how moist your panties are
You: you caress the bulge in my jeans
You: you can feel how hard I am
Stranger: no i cannt, softie
You: fine.
You: PARKER!
You: I NEED PICTURES OF THE AVENGERS WHILE YOU'RE OUT!
Stranger: hahaha why dont you just say your reall name:P
You: MEANWHILE, I HAD TO FIRE SOMEONE ELSE TODAY FOR SOME REASON, SO I NEED YOU TO GET OUT THERE AND BE A REPORTER TOO
You: FIND OUT IF TONY STARK IS A POLYGIMIST
You: DO IT PARKER!
Stranger: WHAT
Stranger: IS
Stranger: YOUR
Stranger: NAME
You: I'M J. JONAH JAMESON, OF COURSE!
You: WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM PARKER?
You: I'M THE PERSON WHO SIGNS YOUR DAMN CHECKS!
Stranger: i think youre a starnger on omeglee who i wanna talk to -cries-
You: (GRANTED, MOST OF THEM BOUNCE, BUT THAT IS BESIDE THE POINT)
You: NOW HIT THE STREET PARKER, OR I'LL JUST GET EDDIE BROCK ON THE JOB!
Stranger: LOL nooooooo i wanna know who you aaare!
You: I WOULD HIRE HIM ALREADY, BUT HE ALWAYS DEMANDS MORE MONEY THAN YOU DO, AND I DON'T HAVE THE HEART TO TELL HIM NO
You: SO I JUST DON'T HIRE HIM
Stranger: thats not very nice, strnagger.
You: IT'S A VERY COMPLEX LOGIC SYSTEM THAT ONLY MAKES SENSE TO PEOPLE WITH THREE J'S AS THEIR INITIALS
Stranger: j.j.j......................... thats not me:(
You: YPU
You: YOU'RE DRIVING ME NUTS PARKER!
You: GET OUT THERE AND GET TO WORK!
Stranger: YOURE DRIVING ME BALLISTIC, bitch
You: OOOOOOOHHHHH HO HO HO HOOOOOO PARKER!
You: I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU JUST SAID THAT
You: YOU KNOW WHAT?
You: YOU'RE FIRED AGAIN!
Stranger: WHAT
Stranger: LOLFUCKYOU"BOSS"
Stranger: what kind of boss doesnt tell his star failure his real name
You: J. JONAH JAMESON, THAT'S WHO!
You: NOW GET OUT OF MY OFFICE OR I'LL HAVE MS. BRANT ESCORT YOU OUT!
Stranger: THAT IS NOT A REAL NAME YOU SON OF A BITCH
You: SHE IS A PRETTY LADY, BUT SHE CAN BE A FEISTY ONE WHEN SHE WANTS TO BE
Stranger: ooh, ms brant. i am so fucking scared of MS BRANT
Stranger: lmao ew
Stranger: dont go thereeeee, boss
Stranger: ill never be able to workj with you wo again
You: MUCH STRONGER THAN A LITTLE WEINER LIKE YOU, PARKER!
Stranger: I AM NOT A WEINER!
Stranger: I AM A GREAT MAN thats actually a girl..
You: YOU'RE RIGHT PARKER, YOU'RE A MAN
You: A MAN THAT HAS TO SUPPORT HIS FAMILY
You: ESPECIALLY IN THESE DIFFICULT TIMES
You: YOU'RE HIRED AGAIN
You: NOW GET OUT THERE AND GET SOME WORK DONE!
Stranger: LOL YOU ARE VERY DYNAMIC.
Stranger: I WILL NOT DO ANY WORK
Stranger: I DONT LIKE the way youre treating ME
You: TOO BAD PARKER! YOU GOTTA GET A THICK SKIN!
You: THICK SKIN IS WHAT GETS PEOPLE WORKIN' IN THIS BUSINESS!
Stranger: nononono happiness and ufn is!
You: HAPPINESS WILL GET YOU NO WHERE PARKER!
You: IT DOESN'T BUY YOU FOOD!
You: DOESN'T PAY THE RENT!
You: PICTURES DO!
Stranger: YE SIT DOES, IT IVES YOU THE M OTIVAITON TO DO S
Stranger: SO*
You: NEVER GET ME A PICTURE OF TONY STARK WITH THREE WOMEN AND I'LL MAKE UP THE STORY!
Stranger: okay here
Stranger: http://www.guzer.com/pictures/flip_off_baby.jpg
You: NO TIME FOR LINKS, PARKER!
You: WAIT!
Stranger: THATS THE PICTURE
You: I'LL CLICK YOURS IF YOU CLICK MINE!
Stranger: okaaay!
You: http://www.lemonparty.org/
Stranger: uh what is ittt.
You: CHECK IT OUT PARKER!
You: SOMETHING YOU'LL LIKE FOR SURE!@
Stranger: LMAO EW
Stranger: MINES BETTER
You: I DON'T CARE
You: I WON'T LOOK AT IT
You: NOW GET OUT THERE AND GET ME PICTURES PARKER!
Stranger: :[ i sent it you bitch
You: PARKER?
You: ARE YOU STILL HERE?
You: PARKER?
Stranger: yeeee
Stranger: ye
Stranger: ye
Stranger: ye
You: PARKER?
You: PARKER?
You: PPPPPPPPPPPP
You: 11100101010001010101011101010101
Stranger: WHWHWHWHWHWHWHWAT
You: SPIDER0SLAYERPROGRAMMALFUNCTION!!1111010010010100
Stranger: yoyoyoyoyoyomama
You: SPIDERMAN!!! PICTURES!!!!1010100100010101011101010101010
You: BROCK!!! BRANT!!! SPIDER-MAN!!!!
You: MENACE!
You: 10101010001010100001010101000101010111101000010101010
Stranger: youre the menace:/
You: TEXTLINECODEREDLINECOKEHEADCRACKWHOREWOODENDOORONTHEFLOOR
You: MENACEDENNISLEARYQUERYCLEARY
Stranger: youre wicked annoying now:[
You: BEVERLYCLEARLYYASACANADIAN
You: 1110100000000000000001011111101110000001111110001111001010000000111111000000111111000011111100011100110
Stranger: ?
Stranger: ar eyou gonna talk or can i leave
You: FEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYYMCCCCCCCNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
You: MCCCCCCCCCCCAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSTTTTTTEEEEEEAAAAAALLLLLLLLYYYYYYY
You: POPGUNCHAOSVINTAGEASTINMARTIN
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[Maze]

 

[crash2455]

This one is fucking epic.

*TOTAL MADNESS FOLLOWS*

what is this I don't even

what did you do there

you shit everywhere

there's shit all over the windows

[BeyondSandrock]

It's always fun when you can get another comic geek who is willing to play along:

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: PARKER, IN MY OFFICE NOW!
You: I NEED THOSE SPIDER-MAN PHOTOS ASAP!
Stranger: but I was out being spider-man!
Stranger: now that would be a comic series
Stranger: of a 5 shot
Stranger: for marvel knights
You: DON'T TRY AND BE FUNNY WITH ME PARKER! WHERE ARE THE PHOTOS FOR THE EVENING EDITION?
You: IF YOU CAN'T DELIVER ON THE GOODS I'LL JUST GET BROCK TO DO THEM! FOR HALF THE PRICE!
Stranger: Well, Jameson, maybe I don't need your money!
You: LIKE HELL YOU DO! NO OTHER PAPER IN THE CITY WILL TAKE YOUR SORRY PICTURES!
Stranger: Maybe I can use my powers for useful
Stranger: instead of use my powers for dead uncle
You: WHAT DID I JUST TELL YOU ABOUT GETTING CUTE WITH ME PARKER! ONE MORE CRACK LIKE THAT AND YOU'RE FIRED!
Stranger: speaking of "crack"
Stranger: I'm gonna crack out my pipe
Stranger: "peter parker smokes a big one in front of J. Jonah Jameson"
You: YOU'RE A DOPE FIEND! YOU'RE FIRED! GET YOUR THINGS AND GET THE HELL OUT OF MY BUILDING!
Stranger: Whoah...wait..what?
You: AND TELL MS. BRANT I WANT MY COFFEE NOW IF YOU'RE NOT ON A TRIP ALREADY YOU DEGENERATE POT-HEAD!
Stranger: I think I'm...like...Spider-man and shit...
Stranger: where are my web shooters?
You: THAT'S IT. SECURITY, ESCORT THIS MENACE TO SOCIETY OUT OF THE BUILDING!
Stranger: psh! YOU'RE a menace
Stranger: heheh
You: WHAT? I'M AN INSTITUTION!
Stranger: you're a PAPER
Stranger: ha!
Stranger: good one
You: LISTEN, I'M J. JONAH JAMESON! I'VE EATEN PUNKS LIKE YOU FOR BREAKFAST AND CRAPPED YOU OUT THE NEXT DAY WITHOUT A SECOND THOUGHT! YOU'RE THROUGH IN THIS THE TOWN PARKER!
Stranger: *leans in uncomfortable close* listen....I'm Spider-man....*breathes in*...*exhales* ...yeah...
You: PARKER, IF YOU DON'T GET OUT OF THIS OFFICE IN THE NEXT FIVE SECONDS, I'M DECKING YOU!
Stranger: maybe your rag says the truth. maybe it doesn't
Stranger: maybe I'll web your mouth shut
Stranger: and I'll have another drom
Stranger: drink
You: WE ONLY PRINT THE TRUTH! ROBBIE, GET THIS DEGENERATE OUT OF MY BUILDING!
Stranger: maybe I'll drink regardless
Stranger: robbie....I know wolverine.
Stranger: getout.
You: THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN TELLING YOU PARKER! GET YOURSELF INTO REHAB YOU WORTHLESS JUNKIE!
Stranger: Wolverine wouldn't get this treatment.
You: WHO THE HELL IS WOLVERINE!
You: YOUR DRUG DEALER?
Stranger: He's an Avenger.
Stranger: Like Captain America?
You: DON'T YOU DARE SULLY THE GOOD NAME OF CAPTAIN AMERICA WITH YOUR DRUG HABIT!
Stranger: Do you read your own rag or do you just shit on it.
You: THAT'S IT YOU REEFER-HEAD! I'M CALLING SECURITY AND THE POLICE!
Stranger: But me and Cap...we go...like..somewhat...back?
Stranger: I don't smoke, but I'll be glad to escort myself out...
Stranger: via your security guards
You: THEN VIA CON DIOS YOU LITTLE PUNK. NO WONDER YOUR MARRIAGE WITH THAT REDHEADED TRAMP FAILED. GET OUT OF MY BUILDING!
Stranger: *spins off* "read a comic my marriage got ret-conned."
Stranger: yeah, spider mans marriage with mary j got redone
Stranger: pretty dumb
You: WHAT DRUG ADDLED ACID TRIP ARE YOU ON PARKER! GET SOME HELP!
Stranger: "...talk to the devil...no seriously...we made a deal."
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[Flawless P]

I'm just waiting for some one to be like.

"Dude JJ I haven't worked for you in years i'm a high school teacher now you senile old man."

[Flawless P]

Stranger: hii:)
You: PARKER GET IN MY OFFICE NOW
You: I NEED THOSE PICTURES OF SPIDER MAN YESTERDAY



well that went well for my first attempt

Here is attempt number two
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
Stranger: Are you male or female,
You: PARKER GET IN MY OFFICE NOW
Stranger: What the hell
You: I NEED THOSE PICTURES OF SPIDER MAN YESTERDAY
Stranger: That's great
You: HOW THE HELL DO YOU PLAN ON SUPPORTING YOUR AUNT WITHOUT A JOB PARKER
You: I NEED THOSE PICTURES TO SHOW THE WORLD HOW MUCH OF A MENACE SPIDERMAN IS
Stranger: Ok you oviously don't have a life you man whore so why the hell are you fucking talking to me
You: HEY I AM JOHN JONAH JAMESON AND I WILL NOT BE SPOKEN TO IN SUCH A MANNER YOUR FIRED!
Stranger: Ok you're mental
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

and again

Stranger: hi
You: PARKER GET IN MY OFFICE NOW
You: I NEED PICTURES OF SPIDER MAN FOR TOMORROWS PRINT
Stranger: asl
You: WHAT THE HELL IS AN ASL PARKER? I HAVE A BUSINESS TO RUN HERE I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR YOUR STREET SLANG
You: GET ME THOSE PICTURES PARKER

I am guessing you get disconnected on alot in the search for the perfect spiderman experience..

[Flawless P]

Finally someone plays along

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: PARKER GET IN MY OFFICE NOW
Stranger: Yes sir
You: I NEED THOSE PICTURES OF SPIDER MAN YESTERDAY
Stranger: I was not aware of that sir.
You: HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO PROVE TO THE WORLD HOW MUCH OF A MENACE SPIDERMAN IS
You: IF I DONT HAVE PICTURES TO RUN WITH MY STORY
Stranger: I'm not sure sir.
You: WELL DO YOU HAVE THE PICTURES OR NOT
Stranger: No sir, I was covering that story on 5th Avenue.
Stranger: I do have pictures for that.
You: DAMNIT PARKER THE 5TH AVE STORY HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH SPIDER MAN
Stranger: Honestly, I'm pretty sure you could just edit a few old pics of Spiderman and nobody would notice, sir.
You: DAMNIT PARKER WE THE PAPERS INTEGRITY TO THINK ABOUT
You: IF YOU CANT GET SOME GOOD PICTURES OF SPIDER MAN DOING SOMETHING QUESTIONABLE I AM GOING TO HAVE BROCK TAKE CARE OF IT
Stranger: That is true, sir.
Stranger: I will try to get pictures of Spiderman doing questionable activities, sir.
You: WELL GET ON IT THEN PARKER
You: WHAT ARE YOU STILL STANDING AROUND HERE FOR
Stranger: I'll get right on it, sir.
You: DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING FOR ME TO RUN IN TOMORROWS EDITION
Stranger: Other than the 5th Ave story sir? Not really.
You: WELL WHAT HAPPENED ON 5TH AVE
Stranger: There's been a string of robberies there, sir.
You: SPIDER-MAN MUST BE THE CULPRIT
Stranger: I asked the police officers on duty about that sir, and they said that was unlikely.
You: GET ME A PICTURE OF SPIDER-MAN ON 5TH AVE AND I WILL PAY YOU GOOD MONEY
You: I DON'T CARE WHAT THE OFFICERS SAID IT WAS SPIDER-MAN I JUST KNOW IT
Stranger: A raise?
You: YOU KNOW DAMN WELL I ONLY PAY YOU IF YOUR PICTURES ARE GOOD
Stranger: Oh, right. I misunderstood you.
Stranger: You'll get your pictures, sir.
You: ALRIGHT THEN GIVE ME WHAT YOU'VE GOT ON 5TH AVE AND GO OUT AND GET SOME WITH SPIDERMAN SO I CAN RUN IT TOMORROW
Stranger: Alright, sir. Here's the 5th Ave pics.
You: ALRIGHT HAVE ROBBIE CUT YOU A CHECK ON YOUR WAY OUT
Stranger: Got it.
You: ALL RIGHT NOW GET OUT OF MY SIGHT PARKER
Stranger: Yessir.
You: congratulations you were the first person to play along
You: now i gtg
You: lol
Stranger: This has been the best conversation I've ever had on Omegle.
Stranger: Thanks.
You: np np

[Flawless P]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: PARKER GET IN MY OFFICE NOW
You: I NEED PICTURES OF SPIDERMAN
Stranger: ok
Stranger: this for weekends or?
You: DID YOU GET THEM OR NOT I NEED THEM FOR TOMORROWS PRINT
You: THE ONLY REASON PEOPLE BUY THE BUGLE IS BECAUSE WE TELL IT LIKE IT IS AND I NEED PICTURES OF SPIDER-MAN TO SHOW HIM FOR THE CROOK HE IS
Stranger: No but uh... hey I got I message from your parants. You wanna here it?
You: PARKER STOP MESSING AROUND MY PARENTS ARE DEAD I AM IN MY 60'S
Stranger: Sorry I forgot... I meant to say your kids.
You: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU HAVE A MESSAGE FROM JOHNNY
You: HE IS ON THE MOON
You: HE IS SUCH A GOOD BOY
You: PARKER YOUR TRYING TO DISTRACT ME I NEED THOSE PHOTOS
Stranger: I can get them tommorow.
You: WE GO TO PRINT TONIGHT PARKER
Stranger: My camaras covered in shit
You: HOW CAN I RUN AN ARTICLE ABOUT THE SPIDER-FREAK BREAKING INTO WAREHOUSES ON 5TH AVE WITHOUT PICTURES TO PROVE IT
You: WHY WOULD YOU HAVE FECES ALL OVERYOUR CAMERA YOUR A FREAK PARKER
Stranger: I threw it at an elephant in the zoo when I found out Mary Jane was banging her milk man and then to my shock and inconvieniance the elephant then bent over and did a ten ton shit straight on my sony cybershot
You: WHAT THE HELL PARKER
You: WHY DID MARY JANE TELL YOU ABOUT HER INFEDLITY AT THE ZOO
You: 1MAYBE YOU CAN GO BACK THE GWEN STACEY PARKER....OH WAIT SPIDER-MAN KILLED HER
You: SEE WHAT I'M SAYING HE IS A BASTARD, WHO KNOWS MAYBE YOUR MILK MAN IS SPIDER-MAN
You: AND HE IS BEGGING YOUR WIFE
You: BANGING*
Stranger: Cause she came with me for a royal laugh and then when I asked her if she wanted some milk she then said. "Oh Peter I can't think about milk right now." I then asked her why and she replied with "Cause I fucked my milkman for kicks"
You: DAMN PARKER, I'M GONNA RUN THIS AS A STORY
You: HOLLYWOOD STARLET BANGS MILKMAN WHILE HER PHOTOGRAPHER BOYFRIEND SNAPS SHOTS OF SPIDEY TO PAY THE BILLS
You: AND THROUGH MY OWN PERSONAL RESEARCH I HAVE FIGURED OUT THAT SPIDEY IS HER MILKMAN
Stranger: How about "Broken heart hits followed by ten ton shits."
You: PARKER THIS IS WHY IM THE EDITOR AND YOUR JUST A CAMERA JOCKY
Stranger: Cameras dont race
You: NOW GET OUT OF HERE AND CLEAN UP YOUR CAMERA, I HAVE A MEETING WITH BROCK TO GET SOME "REAL" SHOTS OF SPIDERMAN
Stranger: Fuck brock
You: IT'S A RACE WHEN I HAVE BROCK IN THE HALL WAITING FOR YOUR JOB PARKER
Stranger: He's a fucking anal leech
Stranger: He is a fucking jizz pirate
Stranger: His birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom suppliers
Stranger: Send his shit out!!!
Stranger: Hes a damn cracker bitch!!!
You: DAMN PARKER I LIKE YOUR SPUNK BUT REGARDLESS OF HIS SEXUAL PREFERENCE HE HAS THE PICTURES I NEED AND YOU DONT
Stranger: He photoshopped them pieces of arse waster
Stranger: Them photos aint one shit!
You: WHAT
You: I HAVE TO INVESTIGATE THIS PARKER
Stranger: While your at it fetch me some cookie crisp
Stranger: But no milk!
You: PARKER I AM NOT YOUR ASSISTANT
You: YOU GET ME COOKIE CRISP
You: AND COFFEE WITH MILK
Stranger: No
You: NOW GO OUT TO BETTY AND TREAT HER LIKE CRAP SO YOU CAN FEEL BETTER ABOUT YOUR OWN FAILED RELATIONSHIP
Stranger: If you ask for milk again I will make that coffee and use my dick cream instead of your bitch ass milk
Stranger: Ok
You: GET OUT OF MY OFFICE PARKER
You: YOUR FIRED
You: I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR CRAP COVERED CAMERA
Stranger: No your hired
Stranger: Your working for me now bitch
Stranger: I own you dog
Stranger: The only thing that your paper is useful for is whiping my ass after a chilli feast
You: QUIT MESSING AROUND PARKER OR I WILL HAVE YOU REMOVED BY SECURITY
Stranger: Fuck security
You: PARKER GET OUT OF MY OFFICE YOUR A CRAPPY PHOTOGRAPHER ANYWAY
Stranger: The only thing that could possibly come out of your life as being benefitial to society is your fucking funeral you son of a bitch dick merchant
Stranger: Fucking negro faggot!!!
Stranger: I will cum all over your Mums rotting body
You: THATS IT PARKER I AM ADDING TO YOUR ARTICLE THAT YOUR ARE A RACIST AS WELL
Stranger: I'm black
Stranger: Therefore negro is a giving dog!
Stranger: Shut your ass up
You: PARKER YOUR A LYING SACK OF SHIT YOUR WHITE AS THE DAY IS LONG
Stranger: No I just thought that seeing as everyone loves Michael Jackson so much then maybe that would be a great look
Stranger: Surgery fucked up everything though man
Stranger: I havn't got layed in six weeks
Stranger: except for that christmas hand job from aunt may
Stranger: she was crying and looking at a picture of her uncle ben while doing so but I still came on her face
You: LISTEN TO YOU PARKER YOUR OBVIOUSLY DRUNK
You: YOU NEED TO TAKE YOUR ASS HOME AND SLEEP OFF THIS HORRIBLE DAY
You: COME BACK WHEN YOU HAVE SOMETHING I CAN USE
Stranger: Hey I'm not drunk ok
Stranger: I'm having fun!
You: YOUR A SICK FUCK PARKER
Stranger: Now surrender your nipples
Stranger: NOW!
You: WHOA LISTEN MY NIPPLES ARE STILL A LITTLE SENSITIVE AFTER MJ WAS OVER HER LICKING MILK OFF MY CHEST
Stranger: oh yeah when ass wad?
You: LAST MONTH
You: SHE WAS ROUGH ON ME
Stranger: Did she let you cum inside?
You: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT PARKER WE DIDN'T HAVE SEX
You: SHE JUST ENTERTAINED MY SEXUAL DEVIANT FANTASY OF BEING A LACTATING MOTHER
Stranger: Oh
Stranger: She rode me when I was asleep and when I woke up she was cumming
Stranger: then she tried to get off but I grabbed her ass down and thrusted fast and hard into her and came inside
Stranger: she was NOT happy
You: WELL THATS ENOUGH OF THIS CONVERSATION PARKER I NEED YOU TO GET OUT OF MY OFFICE NOW
Stranger: So yeah she is having an abortion
You: IM ABORTING YOUR JOB HERE IF YOU DONT REMEMBER
You: NOW LEAVE
Stranger: speaking of which I heard your parants were hoping you were gonna be a miss carrage
Stranger: PRICK!
You: I DONT CARE WHAT YOU THINK PARKER YOU'LL NEVER WORK IN THIS TOWN AGAIN
You: NOT EVEN ASSOCIATED CONTENT WILL TAKE YOUR PHOTOS
Stranger: Oh well.
Stranger: I'm fine as long as I got food in my belly and a licence for my telly
Stranger: Aunt may's daily handjobs keep me satisfied
You: DAMNIT PARKER WE LIVE IN THE USA THERE IS NO TV LICENSE HERE
You: THATS ONLY FOR THOSE OTHER GUYS ACROSS THE POND
Stranger: I made one for a laugh
Stranger: its on my bill board
Stranger: You wanna hear a joke?
You: THATS IT PARKER YOUR CRAZY I CANT DEAL WITH YOU ANYMORE
Stranger: You wanna hear it?
Stranger: Go on
Stranger: Its a good 'n'
You: WHAT
You: WILL YOU LEAVE MY OFFICE
Stranger: Maybe
You: SHOOT
Stranger: Why do the Mexicans never win the olympics?
You: BECAUSE EVERYONE WHO CAN RUN JUMP AND SWIM ARE OVER HERE
Stranger: AHA!
Stranger: Your well equiped
You: NOW GET OUT OF MY OFFICE
Stranger: One more please
You: GO
Stranger: What do you call a musical fish?
You: WHAT
Stranger: A piano tuna
Stranger: BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
You: I DONT GET IT PARKER
You: NOW LEAVE
Stranger: I'm the best
You: IA IA CATHARTIC LOBSTER F'TAGN
Stranger: Knock Knock
You: who's there
Stranger: Boo
You: BOO WHO?
Stranger: No need to cry its only a joke
Stranger: BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
You: DAMNIT PARKER
You: 11100101010001010101011101010101
You: PIDER0SLAYERPROGRAMMALFUNCTION!!1111010010010100
You: SPIDERMAN!!! PICTURES!!!!1010100100010101011101010101010
You: BROCK!!! BRANT!!! SPIDER-MAN!!!!
You: MENACE!
You: TEXTLINECODEREDLINECOKEHEADCRACKWHOREWOODENDOORONTHEFLOOR
You: POPGUNCHAOSVINTAGEASTINMARTIN
Stranger: Knock knock
You: WHOS THERE
Stranger: alex
You: ALEX WHO
Stranger: alex the questions round her
Stranger: * here
Stranger: BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Stranger: I am second to none
You: GO KILL YOURSELF PARKER

[Zeriken]

I loled @ popgunchaos.

[rayner23]

I loled @ popgunchaos.

Thanks! Gotta stop synergizing.

[Zeriken]

The only thing missing from that convo was 'Wu-tang clan.'

[Flawless P]

I'm waiting for us to connect to each other, and both start screaming about spider-man photos.Not that there are very good odds of that.