This is the quest that never ends

[Tadanori Oyama]

But all the people in the north wear green scarfs. You'll need to acquire the fashion sense to distingiush sage green from forest green if your to have any hope of discovering the old man. For fashion sense of that refinement and that quickly (since you really have to use the bathroom by this point) you'll need to attempt the Yves Saint Laurent University program.

[siriq]

When attempting to apply at Yves Saint Laurent University you are told you need a loan, but when applying for a loan you realize that your credit sucks and they tell you you need to increase your credit    However the fastest way this can be obtained by stealing someones credit.

[Tadanori Oyama]

Stealing someone else's credit is beyond your ability but you've heard that you can contact a mysterious identity theft expert known as the Off-White Mouser. You will need to collect a dozen passwords from various thevies around the city and leave them in hidden drop boxes to deliever a message to the Mouser.

[crash2455]

But to get the passwords, you need to break into the Identity Thieves guild, where you'll face deadly force from a variety of master martial artists and a number of deadly traps.

[Tadanori Oyama]

Disarming the traps and sneaking past the martial arts masters will undoubtedly require the work of the conventional thieves guild and their sneaky, stealthy ways. Luckily for you one of the members of the guild recently lost the toe ring his girlfriend got him for his birthday and even though he hates the ring she checks his toes everynight to make sure he's still wearing it, so he can't go home until its found.

[crash2455]

Unfortunately, the toe ring was stolen by the vile dragon Swag, who keeps a horde of toe rings in his mountain fortress.  Even if you could defeat him, how would you be able to figure out which toe ring is the correct one?

[Tadanori Oyama]

There is a spell, which you have heard of, that allows wizards to know the owner of an object. But you are not a wizard! You will have to travel to the wizard's school in the Kingdom of You-Kay and seek tuition from a mage.

[siriq]

You find a mage that is willing to teach you but he requires you to obtain a book that was stole from him.

[Shallazar]

You've heard of the book, and you remember somebody reading it recently. This person was in the park. Unfortunately for you Ninja-Gangbangers have shut down the park to conduct training exercises. As Katanas, shuriken, smoke bombs and hand cant flash around you, and hand can't flash around you realize that you are having deja vu which indicates a glitch in the matrix and you wake up to find yourself growing in a test-tube.

[Setherick]

Unfortunately all of the green scarf people are deaf, mutes, so you must first learn telepathy.

[clockworkjoe]

The only way to become telepathic is to train with the aliens of the Galactic Council. They are happy to teach any who ask them but you must find a wormhole to travel to the center of the galaxy, where they live.

[Salkovich]

The only way to become telepathic is to train with the aliens of the Galactic Council. They are happy to teach any who ask them but you must find a wormhole to travel to the center of the galaxy, where they live.

In order to find this wormhole and travel through it you must first raise the technology level of the planet Earth. Seize control of the world and install a benevolent dictatorship to focus the greatest minds of the world on this task.

[Wooberman]

But in order to focus the greatest minds of the world, there is an issue of overpopulation of wild boars.
You must kill 50 boars

[Flawless P]

When you strike the 50th boar dead a nature spirit Boar Aspect rises before you and flings you from its realm, you must defeat the Boar Aspect in order to complete your quest, however the Aspect can only be damage by weapons made of Glimmersteel O-Positive. The Ore is held in the mines of Clorthos.

[Dom]

However, the mines of Clorthos are located in an alternate dimension where horrors beyond time and space lie. To reach the mine, one must analyze an infamous play about a king and his court. Unbeknown to most, the king is but a mask of an evil entity whose name must be chanted three times to reach his horrific realm.