Another anecdote to amuse me...
Our party was travelling through the woods tracking a bunch of goblins. Thrilling, I know. As usual, we had been drinking our adult beverages while we played, because gaming isn't gaming without it. There was plenty of the usual amusement to go around, and our PC's were generally being very successful.
Our ranger, our glorious ranger, was doing some of the best tracking of his life. He rolled nothing less than 15 on the die, and was managing some incredible tracking scores. Since he was rolling so well, the DM was providing an abundance of information. This was not enough for our ranger though - he wanted more. He finally rolled a nat 20 and was asking every detail imaginable. The rest of us, having been playing for a while, but sitting and drinking for a lot of it since he started his sherlock-holmes-in-the-forest routine, were growing a bit rambunctious.
Ranger "Do I find any tracks?"
DM " Yes, with that roll, you find them all."
Ranger "Can I tell what they are?"
DM "Goblins... same as you have been tracking all along."
Ranger "How many of them are there?"
DM "At least a score."
Ranger "Can't I tell exactly? I got a nat 20."
DM "sigh... fine, there are 20."
Ranger "Were they carrying anything?"
DM "Yes, stuff."
Ranger "Heavy stuff?"
DM "Heavy enough to make some prints deeper."
Ranger "How old?"
Me "37, and his name is Dennis. Is that enough detail for you?"
Everyone "<laughter>"
Ranger "I meant how long ago..."
Me "Sure you did, I was just skipping ahead... now can we get going?"
To this day, he can't ask that question without someone laughing...
