Author Topic: Chatting with whores  (Read 58348 times)

rayner23

  • President of the Apparatus of Kwalish fan club
  • *****
  • Posts: 1306
  • Machine. Unexpectantly, I invented a time
    • View Profile
    • Paladin Curse Blog
Chatting with whores
« on: February 24, 2010, 08:31:05 PM »
As loyal listeners of RPPR's New World Campaign know, I really want to play a game of D&D with a hooker. Okay, so I don't really, but I think it would be funny to see if I can get a hooker to agree to game with us.

So, guess what I've been doing . . .

I went to Craigslist to see if I could find some whores who would even be willing to discuss the matter. So far, I've sent out numerous e-mails with no response, but I have chatted with a whore named Tina Summers on this matter. Here is our chat log:

me: quick question and this may sound a little weird, but bare with me

me: k?

tina summers: 1 question

me: my friends and I are playing Dungeons and Dragons and I was wondering if you would play with us if we paid you. No sex at all!! Just playing D&D. That's it. Would you do that?

tina summers: no

me: may I ask why not or is that my only question?

tina summers: i dont play and i dont wanna

me: we could teach you on the first and that's totally cool, I respect you as a person as a woman to the second

me: btw, you are totally hawt


Give it a shot and see if you can do any better.
I'm from Alaska. About Fifty miles south of Ankorage there's a little fishing town, maybe you've heard of it, it's called fuck your momma.

mrlr

  • Slayer of the Dread Gazebo
  • *
  • Posts: 28
    • View Profile
Re: Chatting with whores
« Reply #1 on: February 24, 2010, 09:12:49 PM »
I think Cody is just justifying his desire to talk with whores.

rayner23

  • President of the Apparatus of Kwalish fan club
  • *****
  • Posts: 1306
  • Machine. Unexpectantly, I invented a time
    • View Profile
    • Paladin Curse Blog
Re: Chatting with whores
« Reply #2 on: February 24, 2010, 09:26:24 PM »
Two birds? Meet my one stone.
I'm from Alaska. About Fifty miles south of Ankorage there's a little fishing town, maybe you've heard of it, it's called fuck your momma.

Kroack

  • I walk between the rain drops, tommy gun and katana in hand
  • *****
  • Posts: 1153
    • View Profile
Re: Chatting with whores
« Reply #3 on: February 24, 2010, 11:26:44 PM »
me: we could teach you on the first and that's totally cool, I respect you as a person as a woman to the second

Lying is the only way to get what you want. Everyone knows women aren't actually people.

Order66

  • Guest
Re: Chatting with whores
« Reply #4 on: February 24, 2010, 11:52:16 PM »
lol it like i wana play D&D so bad but i have no one to play with (light bulb over head)prostitute

Maze

  • Global Moderator
  • Oregon Trail 13 Superstar
  • *****
  • Posts: 665
  • Azathoth Janitorial Services
    • View Profile
Re: Chatting with whores
« Reply #5 on: February 25, 2010, 12:14:57 AM »
You forgot to casually mention the after-game cocaine.

Setherick

  • Administrator
  • Cosmic Horror: 1d10/1d100 SAN loss
  • *****
  • Posts: 2583
  • Economies of Scale
    • View Profile
Re: Chatting with whores
« Reply #6 on: February 25, 2010, 12:23:23 AM »
lol it like i wana play D&D so bad but i have no one to play with (light bulb over head)prostitute

See, this would be a really good rip if you had only take the time to type it out using punctuation.
"Something smart so that I can impress people I don't know." - Some Author I've Not Read

robotkarateman

  • I am worth 100 points in GURPS...ladies
  • ***
  • Posts: 167
  • Mulsk!
    • View Profile
    • AARG roleplaying system
Re: Chatting with whores
« Reply #7 on: February 25, 2010, 02:03:58 AM »
if you had only take the time to type it out using punctuation.

I dunno, I kinda like the idea of a light-bulb-overhead-prostitute. Sounds like something from Futurama.
GENERALA, my free dungeon-crawling RPG, is now available! And it's free!

beowuuf

  • I dream in graph paper lines
  • ****
  • Posts: 355
    • View Profile
    • DM.com - forums dedicated to a 25 year old PC game.
Re: Chatting with whores
« Reply #8 on: February 25, 2010, 02:48:28 AM »

I wonder how much power the self-loathing and daddy issues could generate in kW/hrs

ristarr

  • I dream in graph paper lines
  • ****
  • Posts: 256
    • View Profile
    • Underwater Blues
Re: Chatting with whores
« Reply #9 on: February 25, 2010, 08:54:20 AM »
I think you ought to cut the woman a break.  Playing DnD could offend her religious sensibilities. 

JonHook

  • I am worth 100 points in GURPS...ladies
  • ***
  • Posts: 245
    • View Profile
Re: Chatting with whores
« Reply #10 on: February 25, 2010, 09:14:41 AM »
I'm totally perplexed on why a super-sexy line like, "You wanna play D&D with me?" didn't work.    ???
"Isolation on a ship like this can breed heresy in the dark unwashed corners. I won't find evidence of heresy here, will I?" - Festor Sorebol (an Imperial Psyker in Tadanori's Dark Heresy game: House of Dust & Ash)

Tadanori Oyama

  • Extreme XP CEO
  • *******
  • Posts: 3897
  • The Full Time GM
    • View Profile
    • Full Time GM
Re: Chatting with whores
« Reply #11 on: February 25, 2010, 12:02:27 PM »
Two birds? Meet my one stone.

Said the testicular torsion survive to the Japanese twins.

rayner23

  • President of the Apparatus of Kwalish fan club
  • *****
  • Posts: 1306
  • Machine. Unexpectantly, I invented a time
    • View Profile
    • Paladin Curse Blog
Re: Chatting with whores
« Reply #12 on: February 25, 2010, 06:57:10 PM »
I'm totally perplexed on why a super-sexy line like, "You wanna play D&D with me?" didn't work.    ???

She's a whore. I don't need to be sexy as long as I have the dolla dolla bills and what the fuck do you think my portion of the ransom is going to?
I'm from Alaska. About Fifty miles south of Ankorage there's a little fishing town, maybe you've heard of it, it's called fuck your momma.

Boyos

  • President of the Apparatus of Kwalish fan club
  • *****
  • Posts: 1618
    • View Profile
Re: Chatting with whores
« Reply #13 on: February 25, 2010, 10:34:38 PM »
I'm totally perplexed on why a super-sexy line like, "You wanna play D&D with me?" didn't work.    ???

She's a whore. I don't need to be sexy as long as I have the dolla dolla bills and what the fuck do you think my portion of the ransom is going to?

Thank god for you master!

Wooberman

  • Oregon Trail 13 Superstar
  • *****
  • Posts: 684
  • I have no mouth and I must LOL
    • View Profile
    • Woober's FB
Re: Chatting with whores
« Reply #14 on: February 26, 2010, 02:52:52 AM »
I'm totally perplexed on why a super-sexy line like, "You wanna play D&D with me?" didn't work.    ???

She's a whore. I don't need to be sexy as long as I have the dolla dolla bills and what the fuck do you think my portion of the ransom is going to?

Thank god for you master!

Bless yourself Master, Bless yourself